this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2025
251 points (99.2% liked)

Not The Onion

18923 readers
906 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 35 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Typhoon@lemmy.ca 233 points 23 hours ago (4 children)

The agent... did not know where they were going, and “was in fear that he was being abducted.”

How scary that must've been for him to be stuck in someone's vehicle not sure where they're going and to be in fear he was being abducted! Terrifying! I can't believe anyone would do that.

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 43 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

was in fear that he was being abducted.

Anyway, how about them $SPORTSBALL-TEAM?

[–] Rekorse@sh.itjust.works 7 points 14 hours ago (2 children)

What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on that early?

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

Did you see that ludicrous display last night?

[–] runner_g@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 hour ago

the thing about arsenal is, they always try to walk it in.

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 23 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago)

Sweet irony. Please, give this "man and woman" a medal. Love and kisses.

And I hope the police welcomed the DHS agent appropriately. Maybe put him in a cell, for his own safety of course. Until matters are resolved. Like, who actually assaulted who.

[–] SpicyLizards@reddthat.com 15 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

The HSI agent tried to put the Jeep in park, but Frazier continually pushed his hand away, allegedly threatened to crash the car and said that they were taking him to a police station.

I guess its like a rubix cube for them.

[–] smh@slrpnk.net 3 points 6 hours ago

"threatened to crash the car"? Dude was breaking the cardinal rule of being a passenger in a vehicle--"don't distract the driver". That's dangerous and one of the potential natural consequences is crashing the car.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 4 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

Sauce for the goose

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 126 points 1 day ago (2 children)

FTA:

According to the FBI affidavit, the HSI agents walked up to the Jeep, displayed their badges, identified themselves as law enforcement officers and told Bamigboye that they wanted to talk about his immigration status.

Bamigboye then allegedly jumped into the Jeep’s back seat and yelled at Frazier to drive away.

One of the HSI agents got into the front seat of the Jeep in an effort to stop Frazier while Bamigboye tried to push him out and a second agent tried to pull Bamigboye out of the back seat.

Frazier allegedly put the vehicle in gear and drove off. The HSI agent “was now being involuntarily carried in the Jeep as it drove,” according to the FBI.

The HSI agent tried to put the Jeep in park, but Frazier continually pushed his hand away, allegedly threatened to crash the car and said that they were taking him to a police station.

I'm pretty sure he was not detained. And, I'm pretty sure that just overstaying staying a visa is not actually a crime. I'm pretty sure that entering their car without a warrant for arrest like that is a crime, and gives a reasonable person fear of imminent bodily harm or death.

There's at least cause for a citizens arrest at that point, and while you're not supposed to remove the person you're citizens arresting from the area... driving off to a police station is perhaps the most logically "okay" exception to that.

whatever comes out of this in the courts is going to be fucking metal, though.

[–] UnspecificGravity@piefed.social 45 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (1 children)

The biggest joke of all is that these guys are doing this to enforce shit that's a fucking misdemeanor at best.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 10 points 20 hours ago

Careful, don't give them any ideas now...

[–] SARGE@startrek.website 16 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

There’s at least cause for a citizens arrest at that point

Yes, but....

gives a reasonable person fear of imminent bodily harm or death

Driver could shoot the HSI douche in the head and I'd say self defense isn't murder.

You hop in my car like that, you're gonna have a bad day.

[–] Cocodapuf@lemmy.world 16 points 12 hours ago

Driver could shoot the HSI douche in the head and I'd say self defense isn't murder.

I wouldn't want to test that in court. That's the kind of case only a white person could win.

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 84 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

The agent, who’s assigned to another HSI office and is in Minnesota on “temporary detail for an operation,” is unfamiliar with the Twin Cities, did not know where they were going, and “was in fear that he was being abducted.”

Like rain on your wedding day

[–] elevenbones@sh.itjust.works 18 points 19 hours ago

A free ride, when you're already there.

[–] _lilith@lemmy.world 77 points 16 hours ago

This dumb fuck jumped in their car as they ran away and then had the gall to say he was in fear that he was being abducted 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘨𝘶𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘥𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥

Yeah man you put a mask on and jump in my car I think a reasonable person would assume you are car jacking them

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 50 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

According to the FBI affidavit, the HSI agents walked up to the Jeep, displayed their badges, identified themselves as law enforcement officers and told Bamigboye that they wanted to talk about his immigration status.

I doubt this is the one time they calmly walked up and identified themselves...

The victims probably thought it was a carjacking, and that's why they drove to a cop shop.

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 26 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

the HSI agents walked up to the Jeep, displayed their badges

Even if everything the pig says is true the lack of standardization of ICE lends its self to impersonation. Many places have all kinds of stand your ground and self defense rules that say "if you feel in danger". I am surprised we have not had such a case yet.

[–] halcyoncmdr@lemmy.world 11 points 20 hours ago

They avoid areas that are known to be well armed.

[–] fireweed@lemmy.world 3 points 7 hours ago

Bamigboye also said that he has PTSD from being kidnapped in his native Nigeria.

Bingo

[–] butwhyishischinabook@lemmy.world 42 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (1 children)

If there's any justice in this world they'll know true fear some day.

Spoiler: there's no justice in this world.

[–] khannie@lemmy.world 6 points 16 hours ago (2 children)

There's some justice. One lad even shot Hitler.

[–] anonymouse2@sh.itjust.works 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

A genocidal maniac getting to off himself in a secret bunker isn't what I'd call justice.

[–] khannie@lemmy.world 2 points 15 hours ago

It.... was a joke.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 1 points 1 minute ago

the unfortunate thing about Hitler is that he had some serious brain damage going on along with his constant abuse of drugs. not to mention his army of "yes" men that only propelled him into power to further their own lust for power.

oh wait, that was Donald Trump.

[–] CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works 30 points 23 hours ago

What a convoluted horseshit accounting from Homeland Security. They claim this man saw them and had a mask at the ready to pull over his face as well as a getaway car that just happened to pull up the moment they tried to capture him?

[–] sleepmode@lemmy.world 22 points 17 hours ago

Hilarious. Hope the military cosplayer develops PTSD from it.

[–] fireweed@lemmy.world 20 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

According to the affidavit, Bamigboye also said that he has PTSD from being kidnapped in his native Nigeria.

I don't have PTSD from being previously kidnapped, but probably would have likely done the same thing.

[–] smh@slrpnk.net 7 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

An aquaintance was told "stop" by plainclothes police. He ran. He'd been mugged before and was convinced it was happening again. He got tackled but was physically fine, just shaken up.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 1 points 7 minutes ago

you know, people have been shot for less.

that cop should think twice about doing dumb shit like that.

[–] FishFace@piefed.social 19 points 11 hours ago

I dunno man, if you don't want to get driven away by a stranger, maybe don't get into the car of a stranger.

[–] Pistcow@lemmy.world 10 points 23 hours ago
[–] discocactus@lemmy.world 5 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Would be federal charges... so he can't. But he should announce he is doing it anyway like trump does for people and state laws