this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2025
389 points (98.3% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

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3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

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4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

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5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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3.Mildly Infuriating

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all 33 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de 53 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Gotta hire discord admins. They will take it gladly.

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

I'll also take it

[–] RedEyeFlightControl@lemmy.world 32 points 2 weeks ago
[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 29 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Too many employees licking the bills.

[–] jewbacca117@lemmy.world 33 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Its never the women you want to be hiding bills in their bras

[–] Fredselfish@lemmy.world 17 points 2 weeks ago

Titty is a titty.

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 6 points 2 weeks ago
[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Please do not lick your bills, that's like licking a public toilet.

[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

To be honest, the public toilet is probably cleaner.

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oh yeah. I was being gross on purpose.

[–] UltraMagnus0001@lemmy.world 20 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I never understood putting dirty money in your boobs,

[–] PopcornPrincess@lemmy.world 56 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Lack of functional pockets in women’s clothing.

[–] Localhorst86@feddit.org 36 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

maybe we should find another sollution than having women store money in their bras?

As a conservative, I propose women should no longer be allowed to handle money, when they go outside they need to be accompanied by their husband or father, who will handle their money for them. That way, women are also unable to spend money on useless shit like birth control, pads etc. and can use it to buy proper stuff, like beer and meat!

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Yeah, and let the husband wear the bras, too!

[–] InputZero@lemmy.world 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Localhorst86@feddit.org 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I did not, I deliberately left it out. It should be immediately clear that my comment is sarcasm.

[–] InputZero@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Localhorst86@feddit.org 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Looks like 87% of people leaving votes understood the obvious sarcasm, even without the /s :)

[–] Lumisal@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Bras with pockets, genius!

[–] outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

All money is dirty. Nature of capitalism.

But even if clean money existed, it would get all bloody and fatty abd gross the moment it went inside my boobs.

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Morally dirty is one thing, covered in stripper pussy and smelling like cocaine is another.

At least I can take a shower when I do it, but the money rarely gets washed.

[–] outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Dude the most iconic TWO drinks in my culture are cocaine flavored.

And whats wrong with stripper pussies? Many of them are lovely. Some of my favorite exes and professors have stripped. Were you inside for all of your twenties?

the money rarely gets washed

Neither does the inside of my tits.

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I heavily implied I indulge in both.

Neither does the inside of my tits

Well luckily only Ed Gein would have to worry about that.

Unless i keep money there. Which i generously do not.

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 19 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

At least I can still pay with the money I keep in my underpants.

[–] Mickey7@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's because everyone knows penis and vag sweat is so much sweater than breast sweat

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Can confirm breast sweat is actually salty.

Source: Type O Negative's Love You to Death.

Her salty sweat, drips from her breast

[–] Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 weeks ago

It's not called a ham wallet for nothing!

[–] BabyVi@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago

Its a big hastle to count $200 in sticky $1 bills, but strippers gotta shop too.

[–] DickFiasco@lemm.ee 10 points 2 weeks ago

i.e. No Tiddy Money

[–] Cort@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Alright, prison wallet I guess.