this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 203 points 1 day ago (4 children)

“I’d much rather make a squatter homeless than have a landlord lose property,” James added.

Keeping it classy.

[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 56 points 1 day ago (37 children)

wanted to say the same thing. what a dickhead, simping for landlords.

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[–] johnyreeferseed@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 22 hours ago

I thought for sure I was on the onion when I read that line. Sad that it's real

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 11 points 20 hours ago

he smells like a nimby. he probably would be at the place when MILLBRAE(rich white residents) were complaining about converting a former hotel into a liviing space for the impoverished that occured like last year.

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[–] AmbitiousProcess@piefed.social 112 points 1 day ago (3 children)

“I’d much rather make a squatter homeless than have a landlord lose property,” Jacobs added.

These are the pieces of shit your politicians listen to every time they increase funding for police enforcement against the homeless, and deny zoning changes, even if it would improve the housing crisis. "theft is always bad no matter what 🤓☝️"

You have to be genuinely mentally ill to believe that someone going homeless is better than someone with more properties than they need to live in losing one of those properties so someone has a place to live.

[–] Phegan@lemmy.world 35 points 1 day ago

Breaking: local man enjoys licking boots.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 18 points 16 hours ago

Especially empty properties.

[–] mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 7 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (2 children)

that cannot be a real quote from a real person. it just can't be.

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[–] shininghero@pawb.social 109 points 1 day ago (4 children)

...with professional-grade tactical gear.
The gear includes firearms, ballistic full-body armor, flash bangs and smoke grenades, tear gas...

Where the fuck are you sourcing explosives and tear gas as a civilian, and more importantly...
Where can I get some? Purely for home defense, of course. Definitely not wanting it for defrost purposes.

[–] brap@lemmy.world 54 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Plus points for “defrosting” there, very nicely put.

[–] otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 21 hours ago

It would seem contrary to known physics, but tear gas actually makes frozen water whine like little bitches. 🤷🏼‍♂️

[–] MantisToboggon@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] prettybunnys@piefed.social 12 points 1 day ago

The best part is the 50/50 on if they work or not

[–] tal@lemmy.today 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Where the fuck are you sourcing explosives and tear gas as a civilian

https://www.keepshooting.com/clear-out-6oz-tear-gas-grenade.html

Clear Out 6oz Tear Gas Grenade

[–] Mirshe@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

Totally legal, all of that. The grenades require a $200 DD stamp each (don't think the smokes do, unsure about tear gas - I know I bought smoke grenades for airsoft all the time back when I played), but everything there is totally legal from your local gun show or Bubba.

[–] BigTuffAl@lemmy.zip 51 points 1 day ago

this is a puff piece about the kind of gangster who turns up murdered and unmourned

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 46 points 1 day ago (5 children)

“The average squatter has no melee experience,”

But what about magic? Magic beats melee in the combat triangle.

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 7 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

what about crack, and fentanyl buffs.

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[–] billbasher@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (4 children)

At a distance! This would be close quarter

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[–] deegeese@sopuli.xyz 44 points 1 day ago (3 children)

This fool is going to get shot.

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 38 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I assume it's a joke, but the guy said professional tactical gear and firearms apparently, as well as teargas and such. If he's not joking I'd say their odds of going to prison are pretty good. Premeditating and provoking a situation with deadly weapons instead of contacting actual authorities and following the laws/procedure doesn't seem like it would work out well for anyone.

[–] Typhoon@lemmy.ca 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Isn't that the exact gear that cops use to break up homeless encampments?

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Whether we like it or not, those cops are the proper procedure/authorities in said situation. Thus they are allowed by law. I can't just hire a neighbor to show up to a homeless camp with said gear and expect when something goes wrong for them not to get arrested for murder/battery, and probably be arrested for something else. Paying them to do so probably has a different terminology than an accessory. Might fall under the rico shit, not sure

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[–] ohellidk@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)
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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 37 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Squatters rights are an important part of common law and they serve as a foundational means of ensuring valuable real estate remains in use. Adverse possession requires openly living somewhere for years without permission or resistance from the owner

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[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 36 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

I’d much rather make a squatter homeless than have a landlord lose property,” Jacobs added

I'd much rather make poor people without an option homeless than have a rich asshole lose some money!

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[–] tal@lemmy.today 34 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

sword-wielding man

ASAP Squatter Removal has a 95%+ success rate

Every now and then, you run into a spearman.

[–] SabinStargem@lemmy.today 27 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

These people think evil quest givers in games are role models, not warnings.

[–] Katana314@lemmy.world 6 points 13 hours ago (2 children)

I feel like this is a time to vouch for an element of a story I'm writing.

In this world, there's an Adventurer's Guild. It's named, and oriented, very much like the generic guild that appears in so many generic Anime-MMO medieval fantasy worlds. In it, travelers with weapons, be they swords or bows, complete missions for money.

As one would expect from that setup, the only people with money who ever hire the Adventurer's Guild are wealthy merchants with cargo to protect, or land developers with an excuse to enact aggression on innocent people, or anyone who can veil their murderous intent with some legal excuse. The first way the story introduces them is that a city has contracted with the Guild to use them as extra peacekeepers, and it's a horrible setup because they have no deescalation training. The guild itself lures in members with ideas that they'll "take down troublesome animals for troubled townfolk" and maybe even sometimes have those quests, but primarily, most of the other characters in the story just refer to it as "The Mercenary's Guild. Oh, I guess they call themselves Adventurers' Guild now."

It's my way of getting people to analyze their desire to kill things for rewards, which is fine for a simple game made for children, but shouldn't be part of your fantasies as you grow up.

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[–] FosterMolasses@leminal.space 22 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

We must defend the empty properties!

Also, we must solve the housing crisis by building more houses!

[–] Madison420@lemmy.world 9 points 13 hours ago (3 children)

It's gonna be really funny when dude gets charged with menacing and extortion.

[–] Bakkoda@lemmy.zip 7 points 13 hours ago

He's gonna meet a former mall ninja/disciple of the sword fedora wearing meth head and he gonna die.

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[–] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 21 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Ads for this type of services show up in craigslist regularly where I live. Named organizations like Viking Acquisitions or FAFO LLC post weekly. I bugged the local newspaper about it, but they were disinterested.

[–] fedupwithbureaucracy@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Then I’ll train and purposely squat so that this stain can be humbled

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (5 children)

Ok......but what happens when a squatter has a gun?

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[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 16 points 17 hours ago

Everyone here sucks except the squatters.

[–] Poxlox@lemmy.world 13 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

Nah fuck squatters too. Everyone sucks here but squatters are just as trashy. We need to have a vacant homes penalty desperately but yeah that won't happen anytime soon if ever in my lifetime.

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[–] n0respect@lemmy.world 11 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago) (1 children)

He stabbed me with a sword Mal ... How weird!

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[–] g0d0fm15ch13f@lemmy.world 10 points 7 hours ago

donning full plate armor and a dagger "Luckily I'm no average squatter"

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 9 points 4 hours ago

Home ownership is now a soulslike? I've been training for this my whole middle-aged life.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

bay area homeowners about to lose homes

if you have trouble with squatters, i am willing to sell professional advice on how to get them to leave. it never fails.

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