this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2025

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Did I do a good deed or bad deed? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 3 days ago by allo@sh.itjust.works to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

24 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I was just grocery shopping and mysteriously had an extra 90$ on my foodcard. So I exclaimed to the cashier, "wow i love surprise extra money". The person in line behind me said, "i wish i got surprise money". So I took 5$ and tossed it in her bag, she said "No Wait Dont!" but I had already spun around and was on my way out of the store.

So what was that? Good or bad?

A good deed because it was kindness and generousity? Did her stating she didnt want it make it immoral and thus i should have stayed so she could give it back? Did it all happen as it was supposed to so that she would display herself as nonneedy, I could do the kindness, and, by leaving before anything could change, the state of reality was frozen as is for us beings within?

Please tell me whether I'm good or evil; thank you! :)

top 24 comments

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[–] vala@lemmy.dbzer0.com 60 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Chaotic good

[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago

The BEST kind of good!

[–] roofuskit@lemmy.world 28 points 3 days ago

If that person really didn't need it's, up to them to pass it on to someone who does. What you did was an act of kindness.

[–] poweruser@lemmy.sdf.org 17 points 3 days ago

I agree with the consensus that this was a good thing to do.

It was perfect to leave before the shopper could reject it because it allows her to save face. Either she did need it but was too proud to admit it, or she actually didn't need it and can just pay it forward.

Since you left quickly it made it clear there was no expectation that she should pay it back to you specifically, which could have had unsavory implications

[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Good thing for sure!

If it were me and the lady behind me turned it down like that, I'd probably just say something like..

"Well I was blessed today, so I figured I'd pass a bit along. If you're sure you don't need it yourself, then perhaps go buy a meal for a homeless person or buy a kid a toy for Christmas. Pass it forward."

No evil here, you did a good thing 👍

[–] Zier@fedia.io 12 points 3 days ago

It was a nice thing to give a random stranger something they could actually use. If she felt she did not actually need that, she can easily give $5 to another stranger. Since none of us on the internet were actually there, we really can't judge since we didn't see your or her expression, or tone of voice. Being nice is not a bad thing. You were genuinely nice with no agenda or malice, that's the line between good/bad.

[–] Cruxifux@feddit.nl 12 points 3 days ago

Nah, good deed.

[–] j4k3@piefed.world 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Your username is pUrE EviL. But giving away money is nice. What was it before, Allo IIRC?

Careful doing that with mystery money. If it was a banking error, you may end up on the hook for paying it back and they won't accept that you spent it. Just be aware this is a thing.

[–] allo@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 days ago

nice usernaem too :)

collapsed inline media

this is what it looks like for me (in case u have different emojis). im possessing another body on tuesday tho, and physical forms always have different energies, so I'm about to change to a diff name :)

[–] gustofwind@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

collapsed inline media

[–] Squirrelsdrivemenuts@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

While hiking with my boyfriend and dog I was waiting outside a supermarket one day while he was shopping. A woman and her daughter came to give us some dogtreats and a bag of sweet buns because they thought I was homeless. I couldn't do anything but gracefully accept. We did enjoy the sweet buns and a few days later we spotted a woman with her daughter begging at the train station and were able to pass on the kindness. We are also always on the lookout for beggars with dogs to share out some treats. All in all it caused more goodness (and only slight embarresment) in our lives.

[–] Hello_there@fedia.io 2 points 3 days ago

Chaotic neutral

[–] JohnnyEnzyme@piefed.social 1 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

So I took 5$ and tossed it in her bag...

I kinda wish you'd take another $5 and toss it in to finding a better user name.

[–] IWW4@lemmy.zip 1 points 2 days ago (2 children)

What is a food card?

What is it used for?

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

You chop up lines of coke with it

[–] allo@sh.itjust.works 1 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

food. its for poor people that otherwise have hard time affording food

[–] IWW4@lemmy.zip 1 points 3 hours ago

Oh it is a SNAP card?

[+] Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org -7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

You were bragging.

Imagine if you find 90 million instead. You would become thoroughly unbearable.

[–] allo@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

weird thats one i hadnt considered so either i disagree or am not sure i understand. it happened really fast, was an unusual interaction with a questionable moral aspect, so I thought about it in the car, and then brought it up here cuz not sure what my own conclusion is. i like being kind, but i'm also highly against doing things to others against what they want for themselves. For me it was definitely questionable.

Maybe I don't understand you?

Having a foodcard means i'm poor btw, not rich, which I openly egolessly say. i guess just your comment is weird to me and im having a hard time connecting it to anything and not seeing where it's applicable while all the other comments generally make sense and answer it was a morally good thing to do independent of the questionable part.

😶‍🌫️

[–] Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org -1 points 3 days ago (2 children)

not sure i understand.

I mean you were looking down on her.

i'm poor btw, not rich

But what did you imagine about her wealth? Or her neediness?

Let's turn it around: I am the one with the money now. What if I would offer you in public: I will give you another $90 if I can insult you afterwards, and then you agreed just because you needed the money so badly?

Maybe your next grocery shopping would be secured, but you would be humiliated, even before I started insulting you.

Back to your story: That's why she tried to refuse the 5$. But then you forced it on her.

[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 4 points 3 days ago

Wow, you need to look inward. You've either been hurt or you dislike people trying to be decent.

[–] allo@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

oh interesting thank you for explaining. i do understand! that is sort of what i was thinking as far as wondering if i had done an actual good deed or if it could cause an overall net negative like that. You see the net negative possibility of how it turned out that also caught my attention i think.

unrelated because my behavior wasnt based on it, but in answer to your question she seemed middleclass and not poor nor a scrounger; probably wealthier than me (my behavior was a combination of 'sharing bounty that just befell me, doing good deed, plus she had just wished it'. It was a rare opportunity to instantly fulfill someone's wish. Didn't think of class stuff at all in the moment, but also i rarely do as a person)

thank you for the explanation! I appreciate the perspective!