Ask Lemmy

I'm a fan of the product, but hate a lot of aspects of how it's made.

1. Actors have so much stigmatism to deal with just to work.

2. People are abused far too frequently and lack a lot of protections that they should have.

3. i fucking loathe only fans. It's added a brand new breed of spammers dropping shitty strip teases full of links onto any amateur porn site, normally completely unrelated to whatever place they're posting. If I'm looking at the tinytits sub, your giant tiddy goth gf post is not going to make me send you $5.

Whatever someone wants to do with their body is up to them (within legal limits)

To the people who say "she's selling her body", I say this:

So are you. So am I. So is everybody. A miner or oil rigger is selling their body to be used as labour for 10 hours a day.

An accountant is selling their body to sit at a desk and crunch numbers for ten hours a day.

We're all selling our bodies to corporations every day in exchange for a paycheque. If a person is comfortable using nudity for it, more power to 'em.

Before or after climaxing?

Aroused, usually ...

As long as it's legal, live and let live, imo. Life is too short.

Though I also encourage people to not rely on it as their only outlet for being horny. It creates unrealistic expectations around nudity and sex, which is irritating in certain scenarios.

It's extremely apparent when someone thinks nude beaches are for sex because they've watched a shitload of porn and start acting out. Everyone else is talking with friends, reading books, or getting some sun.

If you want to do voyeurism, go to your local kink events, there's plenty of them through FetLife.

About 10 years ago or so I got really into porn. There was a group of girls I found and really liked. I thought, they were getting paid and doing it of their own free will. No harm. Over the years I saw the outcomes many of them came to. Some died, some became addicts, none seemed ok. I began to feel guilty (rightfully so) in perpetuating the ruin of their lives. I swore it off entirely. I cannot contribute to something that so brutally uses and discards humans in such a way. I'm sorry I ever did and I regret it very much.

I have mixed feelings about porn. I think it's totally fine as a form of media for consumption, and creates jobs. Where I have issues with it is a half and half between there needs to be better protections for the performers to eradicate exploitation, and what to do in regards to how it affects young minds. Nothing inherently wrong with porn, just like other forms of media, but I don't think young people should be getting their hands on it. That being said, that comes down to the parent figure actually parenting and keeping that blocked as best they can from their kids. It's not something that should be gatekept with submitting IDs and such, as that is incredibly problematic. I am also aware of how there can be certain issues in regards to body image and how that affects people. I'm not always big on having to CW everything to death, but I do see that it could be helpful to have a disclaimer on sites to make people aware that the performers are not the pinnacle of body / beauty standards and that what is displayed is not the only way to have sex. It's a topic that takes navigating nuances, but all in all I thing the taboo or stigma should die out. What can help with that is some of what I mentioned. Sorry for the scattered nature of this ramble, I'm tired and have to head out, but I did want to give my input as this is interesting to me.

Same as any purely pleasurable outlet: great in moderation, terrible when one can’t self regulate. I find it easy to avoid rape-y, tween, unrealistic porn in which I don’t find any sexual gratification. There’s plenty of small creators out there that produce wholesome sexual content.

Kinda mixed on the whole thing. Like sure, like any red-blooded (cis/het) male, I like seeing naked ladies. Sure, who (among cis/het men) doesn't? But I also want the girls to be safe, and not abused.

I'm honestly tired of hearing questions like "if you saw your daughter/niece/sister on a porn site what would you do?" and people want to see your daughter, niece, or sister, but not theirs. I feel like the correct answer is "keep scrolling, and make a note to check in with her." Not like "hey I saw your shoot" but more like, "is everything good?" like you should be doing anyway. I mean women don't necessarily do porn because there's a problem in their life and we should stop pretending showing some T&A is indicative of a problem in the first place. Like, seeing a family member in porn isn't one of the best things, but it's not the worst. The worst is, she's at a low point in her life and she's being forced to do it, or being abused, or hooked on drugs, because it's taboo and it shouldn't be.

But at the same time, I'm not gonna pay for porn. There's so much free shit out there anyway. Everyone's got a good camera in their smartphone and people aren't gonna stop posting on gonewild type communities. And I wouldn't care if porn just went away. Maybe it would make society better. Or maybe we'd just get more desperate.

As far as what I like/dislike... I'm not really gonna get into that, but I've noticed, on Lemmy, there's a trend with AI generated women to generate more older women! I love that. Even if they're in their 60s. It's not like a kink or anything, but the older I get, the less I appreciate stuff like "she just turned 18" or whatever. I don't think it's utterly terrible some people wanna see that, but I'm over twice that age! I would never date an 18 year old. Friends maybe, but never more. But the AI stuff is really fucking weird, but it's also kinda cool because these aren't real people, they're people generated by an algorithm. Maybe the algorithm is trained on real people with real bodies, but it mixes so much up you can't really identify it as a specific person. I'm fine with that. But if we can stop people from looking at the illegal/dangerous stuff, and use AI to create it, let those people watch that instead, I think that would be a net positive. Of course you'd want to identify them, tag them and keep them separate from the rest of people; it's not a solution to the problem they create, but if you can reduce the demand for it, I dunno, I want nothing to do with that kind of stuff, but I feel like there's a solution in there somewhere. I probably won't be the one to come up with it. My solution is small, metal, and you can hold a few of them in your hand. I'd like to think there's a better solution out there.

Porn is illegal in the country I'm born in so I kinda feel "privilaged" to have emigrated and can watch it any time I like. (My state doesn't have Age Verification Laws yet xD)

As to actually watching... eh... kinda asexual... so... eh... 🤷‍♂️

Or maybe just depression...

I was raised religious, and fell for the whole "porn makes you unable to form real, properly attached bonds with another human" thing. Then I started reading the scientific background of that stuff, and - while you definitely can damage your ability to form strong relationships with porn (or just about anything else) - that made me far more porn positive.

Maybe this is just me, but I actually watched/looked at far more porn when I felt deeply ashamed of doing so. Now that I'm OK with it, and it just feels normal, it's comparable to a tool I have access to.

why you feel the way you do.

Because it is important if something is useful to me, and it's none of my business what other people watch.

I don't consume much traditional porn but I do read a lot of erotica and look at a lot of hentai and yiff. I usually masturbate at least once a day, usually right before bed ao I can fall asleep easier and sometimes in the mornings to get me out of bed. Sounds weird but super depressed and I know that when I just can't find a reason to get out of bed if I can get myself to masturbate it usually leaves me in a more active state, not necessarily better but able to start soing stuff. Consumed a lot of real porn when I was a teenager. Only had sex a few times, a few men and a couple women and it's probably just me but porn never set unrealistic standards for sex for me. The only real porn I watch nowadays is basically homemade redgifs clips posted in a butt stuffing discord im in. I feel like I have a harder time masturbating to my imagination nowadays, but I'm also masturbating a lot more than I used too and am also on brain meds so hard to tell if that's an affect of porn overconsumption or not.

I've made some porn, I have over 100k views on redgifs, really blew my mind cause it's about as amateur as it gets. Was really nice to feel attractive, desireable even. Wouldn't have minded doing it for a living but I doubt I could have made real money and I can't wnjoy anal that much anymore anyway. Plus I think it would have been hard to keep it fresh, and I wouldn't like to show my face ao that would have limited me quite a bit.

I wouldn't call myself addicted to porn, more like I self medicate with masturbation and the types of porn I consume (erotica, hentai, yiff) are a tool for that. It might be a problem if I had a partner, masturbating too frequently makes it harder to get aroused and cum, but I don't date cause I'd be a terrible worthless partner, so it's not a problem.

For some reason society decided that it was not ok to sell sexual acts. However, if you film yourself doing it, it's allowed. 🤷

Very positively as a concept, and negatively as an industry.

Porn shapes my sexual identity more than I'd like, but that's just the way it is for most people in my life situation. I think I'm a more discerning consumer of most forms of media than others. I hear people talk, in an often-justifiable panic, about how music streaming is changing music listening habits and therefore music. And it's perplexing to me that people seriously have streaming algorithms as their primary way of music discovery, that they don't prefer something more manual. I feel the same way about porn, it's a surprise to me that so many people just accept whatever's on PornHub's front page. To that end, when people say their sexual identity is "shaped by porn" I think people are generally thinking they're into really brutal maledom, raceplay, and incest play. The former two are absolute turnoffs to me, and the latter is something I'm okay with when it's a part of something I'd actively look for. But I'm like...would I know I'm a bisexual without porn? Would I know I wanted to be a femboy which is why I lost a lot of weight? And I know I wouldn't know that I'm into something like gentle femdom or lactation.

I basically only seek out amateur stuff. In a vacuum I like the idea of paying for porn, but I worry about where it's really going; in theory OnlyFans is better but I know that isn't completely clean either, neither are porn companies claiming to be ethical. And I dislike that OF models sometimes exacerbate the parasocial nature of it for profit. If I buy porn, I don't want the vendor pretending it's anything more than me buying a good, but that sells.

I largely believe the current panic about porn addiction to be overblown, and an attempt to exploit male insecurity to get them to vote right wing. I don't outright believe it doesn't exist, but it's in the same sense video games are addictive, not the way crack cocaine is addictive. It's known that the people who report porn addiction often don't actually watch an above average amount, they just have the most shame. I do, however, believe you should be able to masturbate without porn, and that relying on porn over an active sexual imagination is a problem.

I could at least see the logic behind a ban on paid, live-action porn, but anti-porn groups generally include hentai in their bans, so I'm certain it's the same logic as violent video game bans.

Porn is just another tool. People use it in lots of different ways.

Way too many people generalize it's use by other people, mostly because of the shame around sex and sexual identity.

But that's also true of any media or medium. Tons of people still shame TV or video games as evil/bad inherently. And judge others consumption but feel victimized when they are judged for their consumption preferences.

It exists, and 99% of it is made for men

Edit: even (especially) the lesbian porn 😤

It's about freedom and deserves protection.

I like it for sexual discovery and exploration. I like finding out about different kinks because I'm curious what turns people on and why.

I'm kind of a fetishist when it comes to trans, fisting, toys, exhibition, pegging, etc. It's a bit monkey see, monkey do with porn. My partner and I watch some together and get curious to try things out.

I have to draw the line at shit, piss, puke, and blood, though.

Have to be wary of it and it's much better to let it go, kinda like booze. There are worse forms of brain poison.

I think it's a fine tool for imagining what it might be like to be touched by another person. I hope to experience that someday.

Much of it is dull or even repulsive but there's a certain kind of erotic, sensual, wholesome porn that can tempt my eye.

Mostly unethical and exploitative. There was some good consentual stuff a decade ago in the amateur scene but it mostly got wiped when everyone tried to purge all unlicensed material. Hasn't come back because in this economy it just doesn't make sense to make anything like that again for free.

I hear there's ethical production companies now but it's paywalled so anyone who isn't paying for porn is basically getting pavloved into the most rapey antics you will ever witness for generations to come