this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2025
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[–] spittingimage@lemmy.world 82 points 20 hours ago (26 children)

The Last Jedi.

I left the theatre angry that they spent enough money to take mankind back to the moon on something that stupid.

[–] spittingimage@lemmy.world 68 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (5 children)

I can't leave it at that. I have to add some details.

Both the empire and the rebels repeatedly made tactical decisions so stupid a five-year old would know better. The opening battle involved sending unprotected bombers against a ship with anti-bomber defences and keeping the enemy commander talking on the phone to delay his response. That works in a Mel Brooks movie, not in Star Wars.

They killed a fan-favourite character off-screen. What, was the puppet too old to reprise its role?

The empire's main guy decided to chase the rebels down instead of destroying them immediately. For fun, I guess.

Phasma's a badass. Except that she capitulates at the first sign of personal danger.

All Holdo had to say was "yes, there's a plan. Not telling you what because of operational secrecy". Instead she expected Poe to blindly follow orders when he'd already shown he couldn't do that.

"Oh no, the sacred texts!" ...that you attempted to burn a moment ago.

[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 50 points 19 hours ago

My favorite bit:

Leia gives Rey a pendant and tells her that she can use that to track them wherever they go.

In the SAME SCENE, with NO CUTS, they are tracked by the first order and shout "THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!"

You just described, IN THE SAME SCENE, how it is, in fact, possible.

Bonus: Putting a tracker in the Falcon was how the Death Star found Yavin IV in the very first movie.

[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 23 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

All Holdo had to say was “yes, there’s a plan. Not telling you what because of operational secrecy”. Instead she expected Poe to blindly follow orders when he’d already shown he couldn’t do that.

Well, he did fine following orders in the first movie, and then they changed the entire character in the second movie but kept the same name. I have no idea why they did that.

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[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 14 points 15 hours ago

I highly highly recommend this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuuDTnMPMgc

I think you'll like it a lot. I realized that bathos is what I hated about the Last Jedi. They killed so many truly deep moments to have stupid jokes. They couldn't let anything just be serious. It ruined the tone of the movie, couldn't decide if they wanted to be a comedy or a drama, and so they did neither.

[–] MotoAsh@lemmy.world 12 points 19 hours ago

You expect a movie director only interested in pretty scenes to write a good plot!?

... your name must be Kathleen Kennedy...

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[–] MagicShel@lemmy.zip 9 points 17 hours ago

And yet... it's my favorite post-OT movie. It could've used another draft to tighten a couple things up here and there, but it was good.

Now... TRoS is one of the worst films I've ever seen in my life and is the only Star Wars property I've only seen a single time and never will watch again. Hell I watched Book of Boba Fett twice. Shit, I've watched In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale twice. I'd have to go back to Battlefield Earth to think of an equally terrible film.

But when watching The Last Jedi I feel nothing but joy.

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[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 59 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

The Hobbit trilogy. It's hard to understand how Peter Jackson could mess up movie after movie after movie like that.

[–] justOnePersistentKbinPlease@fedia.io 49 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

Simple:

He and his crew had 2 years of prep for Lotr, storyboards, finding locations, making props and sets, etc.

New Line Cinemas forced him to do that same prep in 6 months for the Hobbit. Allegedly they didn't even fully finish the script and had to cut in Del Toro scenes.

[–] Stovetop@lemmy.world 54 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

The forced trilogy structure also really hurt it. When the Hobbit film adaptation was initially announced (at the time just two movies, even), I thought that it didn't make any sense to adapt a book shorter than any of the individual LotR installments into multiple movies. When they revealed it would be a trilogy, I knew it was some studio decision to milk it for money and didn't have high hopes.

There is actually a fan edit floating around online somewhere called "The Hobbit: Extended Edition" which, contrary to what the name might imply, cuts down the trilogy into a single movie of comparable length to the LotR Extended films. Still not perfect, but a huge improvement in quality just from cutting out all of the extra garbage that didn't need to be there.

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[–] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 9 points 17 hours ago

I think it was Prime's Theater where I learnt that for the Smaug fight scene for movie 2, they planed the set the night before, painted the next morning, filmed, and the paint was still wet when the sets were taken down.

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[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 53 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) (3 children)

'Live action' remakes of animated classics, or any remake of an already good film.

Remake the ones that had potential. but failed in the execution.

[–] Maestro@fedia.io 19 points 13 hours ago (3 children)

All those Disney live action remakes are sooo bad. People just don't have the expressiveness of cartoon characters. The Lion King was the worst. The characters were animated and still wooden

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[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 52 points 20 hours ago (7 children)

Borderlands. How did they spend that much money and none of the decision makers stop and think "nope this is crap"

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[–] radix@lemmy.world 39 points 20 hours ago (4 children)
[–] MotoAsh@lemmy.world 16 points 19 hours ago

What, you didn't like the butthole cut?

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[–] capuccino@lemmy.world 35 points 21 hours ago (8 children)
[–] Cascio@lemmy.world 30 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

You mean, "Dances with Smurfs"?

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[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 19 points 20 hours ago (4 children)

Avatar at least had the excuse of existing to push 3D and mo-cap technology.

Not sure about Avatars 2-5...

[–] Balaquina@lemmy.ca 10 points 19 hours ago (6 children)
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[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 12 points 20 hours ago (2 children)
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[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 12 points 19 hours ago

i love that the answer to "which one?" is "doesn't matter, they suuuuuuck"

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[–] Odo@lemmy.world 33 points 13 hours ago (6 children)

Battleship. It's just such a bizarre license for a movie, and certainly one nobody ever asked for. (Well, outside Hasbro execs clearly desperate for another Transformers-level hit.)

Oddly watchable in a big dumb fun kind of way, at least. And hey, it has Jesse Plemons not playing a total sociopath, so that's neat.

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[–] badbytes@lemmy.world 32 points 19 hours ago (6 children)

All of the Jurassic Parks sequels.

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[–] Usernameblankface@lemmy.world 32 points 20 hours ago (21 children)
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[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 23 points 14 hours ago

Ohh i forgot another one of my favorite. Ghost in the Shell live action. I love that movie because of Scarlett Johansson, but if you watch the original anime, everything just feels better, and the live action is simply unnecessary.

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 23 points 15 hours ago (5 children)

There's a distinction to point out between "absolutely no business getting made" vs "the final product turned out to be shit". I can't really think of anything that belongs to the former... I haven't actually seen most of the films mentioned here so far, except the SW sequels... which turned out to be shit, but that doesn't mean they shouldn't have made SW sequels at all: they just shouldn't have made them shit.

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[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

[–] ignirtoq@fedia.io 22 points 20 hours ago (4 children)

At least it was better than Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

[–] Flamekebab@piefed.social 10 points 19 hours ago (4 children)

Did we watch the same movie? I marathoned all the films and Dial of Destiny is dire. To be honest, only the first film is truly great. I'd probably rank them 1, 3, 4, 2, 5.

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[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 18 points 20 hours ago (7 children)

Pearl Harbor. 5 minutes of cool CGI, rest of it being absolutely forgettable.

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

Id rather watch earl arbor. Its about a guy named earl who is also a tree.

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[–] Twinklebreeze@lemmy.world 16 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

A lot of the Movies Sony makes now. Morbius, Kraven, etc.

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[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 16 points 20 hours ago (2 children)
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[–] Denjin@lemmings.world 15 points 7 hours ago (10 children)

Waterworld. At the time the most expensive movie ever made and the most spectacular flop of all time.

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[–] frenchfryenjoyer@lemmings.world 11 points 5 hours ago (1 children)
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