this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone 346 points 17 hours ago (3 children)

Why are all my variables suddenly named after SS officers?

[–] kambusha@sh.itjust.works 121 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
[–] ch00f@lemmy.world 102 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago) (1 children)
  • Auswitch statement
  • V2latile variable
  • Goebboolean
  • Zyklon C++
  • Left shift, Reich shift
  • Open and close Parenzer
  • Iron Cross-compiler
[–] kibiz0r@midwest.social 27 points 14 hours ago

Thanks I hate it!

[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 80 points 17 hours ago

if (hasBillion) { throw new NaziSalute(); }

[–] Taiatari@lemmynsfw.com 33 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

It's for familiarity, that way you can remember the variables better. taps head

/s obviously

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 231 points 17 hours ago (3 children)

I am a professional encoder and I always put all my codes in a single big file marked EXE for faster execution.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 44 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

James? I told you not to share or office secrets!

[–] kambusha@sh.itjust.works 38 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

What does the office secrete?

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 23 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] skuzz@discuss.tchncs.de 35 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Don't forget to put them all in italics so they execute faster!

[–] ricecake@sh.itjust.works 19 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

No, that makes them slower because theyre leaning into the wind. You want to try to mostly use A's, because they're the most aerodynamic, and anything else should be formatted as subscript to keep code size down and reduce drag. C should be avoided at all costs because it's just going to catch the wind.

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[–] negativenull@piefed.world 189 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Get popcorn ready

Upload the entire Linux kernel, then submit the "fixed" code as a PR to Linus.

Enjoy popcorn

[–] CaptDust@sh.itjust.works 126 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

My sibling in christ, we are trying to code not cause a NATO conflict.

[–] unwillingsomnambulist@midwest.social 41 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I’d love to see Linus verbally bitchslap the fuckwit. Or physically, that’d be cool too.

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 18 points 9 hours ago

I think that Linus becoming less of an abusive asshole over the years has been a positive development, but I wouldn't mind the return of the old for this event

[–] nonentity@sh.itjust.works 129 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

No one who legitimately knows anything about computing speaks like this.

He’s truly a moron’s hallucination of a genius.

[–] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 49 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (1 children)

Wdym. Just copy-paste your source code. Go ahead. That one single file with the source code, copy-paste it.

[–] saimen@feddit.org 17 points 4 hours ago

Not copy-paste. Cut-paste. As an additional feature that way your source code becomes as light weighted as 0 Kb.

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemmy.zip 100 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

So "don't talk to strangers" or "don't give your credit card info to strangers" never really reached the audience, did it?

[–] AreaKode@lemmy.world 20 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

This is the future. Robots are more people than people now!

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[–] Davin@lemmy.world 84 points 10 hours ago (5 children)

Yes, I who knows a lot about programming, only use one file per application.

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[–] Vince@lemmy.world 68 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Hmm, can you upload files? Wonder if they set an upper limit. Wonder which language would burn the most cycles?

[–] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 84 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Knowing how half-assed they've been deploying Grok a ZIP bomb would probably work on it if they allowed file uploads.

[–] BassTurd@lemmy.world 17 points 15 hours ago

I really want someone to try this and report back. It really does feel like something that could execute.

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[–] KickMeElmo@sopuli.xyz 47 points 17 hours ago (5 children)

Ask for all output in brainfuck.

[–] MrLLM@ani.social 19 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago)

I have asked several LLM to output brainfuck and Malbolge, but none of them seem capable to do so, even those that implement train of thought, me included ofc.

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[–] turdburglar@sh.itjust.works 67 points 12 hours ago (4 children)

please don’t use grok.

elon is poisoning the air over memphis with exhaust from the generators that he’s using to power it while using drinking water from the memphis sands aquifer to cool it.

please don’t use grok.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 30 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

You're probably preaching to the choir here. lol

[–] turdburglar@sh.itjust.works 18 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

i just wanna keep sayin it out loud so maybe folks remember.

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[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 54 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Do you have to print it out and scan it first?

[–] resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world 24 points 16 hours ago

Only if you don’t have a fax.

[–] maxwells_daemon@lemmy.world 49 points 17 hours ago

It will definitely not report back to Musk on your proprietary code...

Because Musk wouldn't understand shit, it'll report back to some Indian guy instead.

[–] m0darn@lemmy.ca 44 points 10 hours ago

Presumably anybody that does this gets their code integrated into the training data right?

[–] MonkeMischief@lemmy.today 44 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

From the genius and his whipped minions that brought you MechaHitler after some "fixes and improvements"...

...Comes the same AI that offers to "fix your code."

Wow. Simply astounding. A magnificent feat indeed, to waste so many finite precious resources over such garbage.

Kindly Ctrl+A and shift-delete "All your code files", sir.

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[–] MTK@lemmy.world 38 points 5 hours ago
# Checking validity of each file
for file in directory:
  content = file.read()
  for keywords in ("heil hitler","hitler did nothing wrong","kill the jews","hitler was the victim","there is no evidence for the Holocaust"):
    if keywords in content:
      return True

# File is Invalid and fake news
return False
[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 33 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

how does the AI know what the rest of the project is like? Or what the purpouse of the file is?

[–] CaptDust@sh.itjust.works 93 points 17 hours ago (6 children)

What do you mean "rest of the project"? Don't you put all of everything into a singular neatly contained file? It's way more optimized that way

[–] 0ops@piefed.zip 24 points 16 hours ago

That's how I read the tweet, dork never got further than Programming 1

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[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 30 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (3 children)

Using Grok to develop Grok... This sounds like Model Collapse with extra steps.

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[–] cupcakezealot@piefed.blahaj.zone 29 points 4 hours ago (2 children)

i think ive pinpointed exactly why twitter devs are terrible

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[–] kn0wmad1c@programming.dev 29 points 14 hours ago

Wait, so if everyone at xAI does that, does that mean that Grok's own source code was the result of Grok's output?

And then they once again feed that source into Grok?

Dude is destroying his own product. Again.

[–] AlecSadler@lemmy.blahaj.zone 26 points 11 hours ago (2 children)

I do work for an AI centric company and we've used almost every major model in some way, shape, or form.

Grok was so bad on all fronts that we ceased using it completely.

So I don't believe this for one second. I don't even find ChatGPT to be useful for code. I'd probably put Claude first and versions of Gemini second, with no current third.

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[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 26 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Hey Grok, take this one file out of the context of my 250,000 line project and give me that delicious AI slop!

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 25 points 13 hours ago

Just really fuck up this shit. I want it unrecognizable!

[–] uss_entrepreneur@startrek.website 24 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

Wait so are they using grok to code grok? No wonder it keeps getting shittier

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[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

Why the fuck can't these assholes just go away?

You've won life. We get it. Good for you. Why do you need more money? Why do you need to constantly be the center of attention?*

It truly is just a handful of unscrupulous, malignant narcissists that have ruined everything (including the planet) for everyone else.

*these are rhetorical questions

[–] lowered_lifted@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 8 hours ago (3 children)

I find that without being able to see the rest of my IDE it makes no sense to just paste a single class worth of code at a time in there, it has no context for the rest of the application

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[–] Matriks404@lemmy.world 18 points 3 hours ago (2 children)

Yeah, that's definitely a thing that is perfectly legal to do. Your company will definitely be fine with that.

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