Ask Lemmy

More public transit and more public spaces. Transit that you don’t have to think about taking (because it’s safe, frequent, and cheap or free) takes you to new places or to familiar places more often, and lets you meet more people more often. And going outside and doing shit is just good for you, I’m sorry to report.

Double the minimum wage and standardize a four day work week. People need more free time and resources in order to socialize effectively.

Legitimately stop treating phones like a necessity. Leave them at home more. Treat apps more like accessories and less like doorways.

Opt more for going in person to places to do things. By bike or transit whenever you can. Go to public events at your local parks and venues. Attendance is its own form of support, too. Anything we can do to purposely put ourselves in front of other people who share different perspectives than ourselves is good for us.

I think a lot of people don’t realize that there is a sense of responsibility when it comes to putting ourselves out into the world. If you think you’re capable of helping others, simply being a positive person in a public place, even just to have some fun meeting with friends, is a step in the right direction to building a better world. Nature will eventually setup a situation for you to be called upon. But this never happens from in your house or apartment.

no more social media

Multi dwelling houses: a house with a central living area and apartments of different sizes linking in to it.

The central area has a big kitchen, dining, play area, halls link it to a 1-bed, 2-bed and 3-bed apartments each with a little kitchen as well.

You can be on your own in your apartment or go use the big kitchen, join trivia night, etc

For a lot of people in suburbia, the entire concept of indoor "third spaces" is mostly "pay to play" at the end of a drive. A big exception to this is/were shopping malls, but those aren't always close by. To get to more a functional social fabric, we have to provide more convenient ways of interfacing with our neighbors that don't always require money to change hands.

Perhaps this is a predictably orange-pill response, but we need to change zoning in a big way. Each suburban development has the street plan and infrastructure to support small businesses and common spaces, walking-distance from everyone's front door. All it takes is to allow small-scale commercial development in corners of these collections of tract-homes and, just like that, you can have something like a functional village. Beyond that, encouraging more development of community recreation space, both indoor and outdoor, would go a long way to provide a place for people to mingle.

Edit: strip-malls don't count. They're often at the very edge of residential areas, and are tied up with way more capital than what I'm talking about. That's why they're made up of franchises, require ridiculous amounts of parking, and contribute to "stroads" and all the knock-on effects and hostile architecture that requires.

Parks full of cats?

Structured way of spending a lot of time in the same environment with other people with similar goals. "Go out on your own and make friends" doesn't work for many of us, additional free time will not help.
There's a good reason most people make long-term friendships in school and university, we need a similar space where we are surrounded by the same people every day (even though we may not like all of them). I have no idea what could it be since our society frowns upon such ideas.

Before Covid the office kinda took this role, however it was a gamble and not voluntary.

Step 1

• Demolish all housing - everyone is homeless now

Step 2

• Mandate that everyone design their own silly costume - this is all you're allowed to wear

Step 3

• Legalize and subsidize all the fun drugs - everyone gets a weekly allowance of shrooms, ecstasy, etc

Step 4

• Loneliness is officially replaced with several other problems

For starters, Ubi, and then expansive and free public transit for all and accessible for all including disabled people, more free places to just go and exist, no facism and more community. That's just for the beginning though

Fighting fascism, together.

Spend less time online, do less digital activities.

I do more IRL, in-person, activities. Any kind of activity most of us somehow forget we used to do well before Internet and digital was a thing can still be done without the Internet and without a computer of any kind.

In-persons is intimidating but it also helps keep away the armies of online trolls and haters that online thrive to hurt other people. Provided one behaves like a decent human being, it's very rare people IRL will hate on anyone for goofing up or for not agreeing with them. It's ok.

I also do as much as I can the analog way, without anything digital. It helps. Be it to write or sketch, or do stuff with my hands. Heck, even me using a paper agenda instead my phone will regularly trigger surprised/interested questions from people that otherwise would probably never have talked with me to begin with ;)

Make friends in meat space. Have activities you do with other people regularly

I began offering weekly board game gatherings and dinners for the public, and, aside from the rocky start (no one at the first 2 events), every gathering has always gotten a minimum of 3-8 people here in West Allis, WI!

I've been using this website in conjunction with a Facebook group: https://gamenight.host/@wa_bgn

Talk to old people. They have time to listen. Delete all social media.

Increase taxes on places that sell take home alcohol and decrease tax on alcohol sold from licenced venues.

It should be cheap to go out.

Keep people in adjacent cages on a big rectangle of concrete next to a swamp so they get all the social time they need. Kid Rock plays to keep up morale every Friday night.

Lets cap the population of cities to 10 000 and make everyone live in a small town.

One night a week of mandatory, free, tabletop RPGs hosted in libraries, council buildings, etc. D&D (or even a good roleplaying game) for everyone! Player groups are mixed up every two months to ensure multiple opportunities for bonding with new people.

Be comfortable being alone.

I think the big challenge now is to create a method of online dating that isn't a miserable experience for most of its users, but if I had a creative solution for that, I'd be rich.

Other than that, AI friends. That's the future.

Get rid of smartphones entirely.

My shitpost response is that I personally plan to be sluttier.

My serious response is that social media needs to be more social.
I hate Facebook because it’s just an advertising platform, but I don’t know what is going on if I avoid it. I wish there was a way to just share social calendars with all my friends. Like - I want a group tracker that one-click adds stuff that I find interesting. I want to only see stuff certain folks have added to their tracker, and have the ability to share with folks what stuff I’m sharing to share, vs what I’m sharing because I’m actually going to attend something. Make it easy to connect with folks, not advertisers.

Go to open mic or karaoke nights. Hype everybody up. Talk to people after their performance.

Start a hobby and find a local group to do your hobby with other people. Sometimes if you’re really into the hobby the group will find you. E.g. you’re at the park doing your hobby and see other people doing your hobby. You talk to them and they know a group of people doing it too.

Assuming your job doesn’t involve much face to face interaction, volunteer somewhere in person and talk to the people you’re working with and the people you’re serving.

Set up a booth at a high foot traffic area with a sign that says, “Free jokes.” Or “Free Magic.” Memorize some decent jokes or magic tricks and do them. Talk to people. Ask if they want you to perform at their house for their friends. Become the token magician friend.

For me, working in human services does the trick. Over the summer I take a vacation to heal body/mind, and swap to spending more time on MMOs, a Mud, and making sure I go “out” somewhere at least once a day. Even just to the library.

Live with friends.

Go to the bar, drink, tip well. At least the bartenders will want to socialize when they can, even if only for their own self interests (tips). Also, other patrons might be in the same boat, and you can commiserate over drinks!

• Sport and art
• low cost and free places to do sport and art
• linked together by public transit and clean, safe places to walk, run or cycle (or scoot or skate or whatever)
• a shorter working week, so people have time to do the above
• a higher minimum wage, so people can afford the (ideally low, if necessary) costs involved

So, e.g., lots of parks with publicly accessible five-a-side football pitches, ping-pong tables, basketball courts, skateparks whatever - that's your sport. The parks also have bandstands or outdoor theatres, where there's space for that.

Public libraries with rooms people can hire (or use for free) for book clubs, sewing circles, art classes - that's your art.

Good thing about the above is that all these ideas already exist in lots of forms, you just pick whatever works best for your current situation.

Is the epidemic one of loneliness or one of improper socialization, a background fear of people and purposelessness? Sadly, idk how to make people change their minds and hearts besides just talking to them and hoping something sticks.

Abolish digital slavery and publicly code and fund the public commons with no scraping or exploitation whatsoever. Restore the rights of autonomy and self determinism required for a citizen in a democracy and people will return to the culture that existed before google won its privateer piracy charter to digitally enslave everyone in exchange for free email and search results because the US was too backwards to fund the fundamental public commons required for real democracy and was itching for slavery again at the first opportunity of going unnoticed.

Mandatory copulation every 14 hours.

As any other problems, it's an issue with political will

• Have minimum delivery fee to force people to visit physical store over "online shopping" and promote farmer marker and city-centre (village-centre) shopping so people interact with each other

• End-up US style suburbanization, these nice house in a quiet area are great to sleep-in but means you're away from every social activity, and when you're too young/too old to drive it turns into house arrest

• Increase subsidises for non profit-club, especially for the one having under 25 and above 65 members If you go playing scrabble, theatre or practice Karate you stop being lonely

• Carpooling parking and lanes to push worker to interact with people living nearby

Turn off internet access, or throttle it to the minimal usable speed.