this post was submitted on 02 May 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 130 points 1 month ago (6 children)
[–] remotelove@lemmy.ca 44 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 27 points 1 month ago (15 children)

I thought my hand gesture was a chef's kiss for such a confluence of events. Not sure what you're on about.

[–] Theatomictruth@lemmy.dbzer0.com 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] peregrin5@lemm.ee 21 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Wtf. This is hilarious. Why are men so insecure?

[–] GeeDubHayduke@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 1 month ago

I'm not insecure! YOU'RE INSECURE!

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[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

that radical feminist groups have propagated these hidden messages to humiliate men with small penises

Why would radical feminists target men with small penises? They’re probably already naturally humiliated, right? It’s the big dick men who need to be taken down a notch.

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[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.blahaj.zone 104 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The prophecy has been fulfilled

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)
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[–] SoupBrick@pawb.social 98 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] SARGE@startrek.website 33 points 1 month ago

My first thought was ".... Again? They need some better contraceptives" but no, it's the same one... A shame, that would open the door for so many jokes.

[–] k0e3@lemmy.ca 77 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is a sign. The second cumming of Christ.

[–] NONE_dc@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago

Thats it, you won the comments section.

[–] 2fm@lemmy.world 70 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Two balls! Wait.. what's that? Over there... It looks like a big...

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 58 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Weiner's and beans! Get yer Weiner's and beans! Holy shit kid! over there, that looks just like a...

[–] Stamau123@lemmy.world 52 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Wang! Pay attention!

Sorry teacher, I was distracted by that giant...

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 46 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Cock your head! Do you see it?!

Oh yeah, it looks like a massive...

[–] FordBeeblebrox@lemmy.world 40 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Rod, check this out! It looks just like a huge..

[–] Sonicdemon86@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Pecker, oh that's not a woodpecker it looks like a huge ...

[–] Apeman42@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Johnson! Radio the admiral! This ship's about to be plowed by that enormous-

[–] GeeDubHayduke@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"COCKLES!!! OYSTERS, CLAMS, AND COCK-- say, am i the only one seeing this..."

[–] libra00@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

Penistone is a small town in South Yorkshire, England.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 67 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Now THIS is what I want to see from this community

[–] ToastedRavioli@midwest.social 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The universe heard that guy complaining yesterday and said “hold my beer”

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[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 38 points 1 month ago

Everything reminds me of him 😞

[–] Adderbox76@lemmy.ca 33 points 1 month ago

Even mother nature looked at our present timeline and said "Yeah...fuck it....let's see how crazy shit can get."

[–] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 28 points 1 month ago (3 children)

You think that's big, you should see the size of it under the water.

[–] FlightyPenguin@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Also, this is what it looks like when it's cold.

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[–] NewSocialWhoDis@lemm.ee 24 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I am kind of disappointing this is actually from 2023 though! It needs to cum again.

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[–] Initiateofthevoid@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Okay... 2023? How did I miss this? That can't be real. Is it real? Maybe this really is all a simulation. But, like, it's just a game of Sims, and the player started getting bored... It sure would explain a lot.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 9 points 1 month ago

At least we know whoever designed the simulation appreciates phallic humor.

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[–] HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] FoolishAchilles@lemm.ee 14 points 1 month ago

Finally an article that made me believe I was reading the onion

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I mean, who names a bay in Dildo county Conception Bay (or vice versa)? The iceberg is just the tip!

[–] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

THE PROPHECY!

[–] Outsider9042@lemmynsfw.com 13 points 1 month ago

Fake news! The entire iceberg does not look like a dick.

It’s just the tip.

😶‍🌫️

[–] Little8Lost@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

phallus [...] floating in conception bay

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[–] macaro@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This happened two years ago…

[–] OrteilGenou@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

And it still hasn't melted? Checkmate, environmental lobby

[–] nokturne213@sopuli.xyz 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Alas, the iceberg lacked staying power: Pretty photographed the 30-foot (9.1 meter) phallic structure on Thursday, April 27. It collapsed the next day.

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[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

I always thought "D.C." meant "District of Columbia." TIL from the combination of your username and post that it means "Dildo, Canada."

Kind of a weird name for the capital of an entirely different country.

[–] Hazmatastic@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

We're gonna need a bigger M&M's tube....

[–] cod@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

Most of my family is from very near there. I remember when this happened, it was quite the event

[–] kescusay@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (2 children)

It's old, but... I'll allow it.

Also...

Dingdong. Willy. Johnson. One-eyed sailor. Trouser snake.

Now it's your turn.

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[–] fmstrat@lemmy.nowsci.com 9 points 1 month ago

Someone had an interesting "on this day"

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