this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

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-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

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-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

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-Do not Brigade other Communities

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-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

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9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


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[–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Man I thought I was the only one who got that stupid line as a kid. My condolences.

[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yeah I got it too. Apparently it's not that uncommon sadly.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 7 points 1 day ago (4 children)

And other classics like "wait until your father gets home" and The Belt™.

[–] Hexagon@feddit.it 4 points 1 day ago (2 children)

"If you tell me the truth, I won't get mad"

[–] Texas_Hangover@lemmy.radio 1 points 1 day ago

That worked on me, ONCE.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 points 1 day ago

"George Washington's father didn't hit him with the belt when he came clean about the cherry tree!"

"Yeah, well Washingon's dad wasn't in the tree when he cut it down!"

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The Belt might beat The Chopping Board or The Switch, though. Hard to pick a fav honestly.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

The Switch

No kid in my youth wanted The Switch and, now all of a sudden, they're all the rage. 🤷‍♂️

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The funny thing is, I'm not completely sure if you're referring to the game console or BDSM

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

That may just be my friend group of switches asking for the switch before they play switch and cuddle

[–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Lol my dad wasn't coming home and she preferred a fly-swatter, which I should probably be grateful for.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I guess it depends which part hit you; the soft part or the thin, metal wire handle. 😬

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Calling the stingy plastic tip that squishes the bugs 'soft' is an interesting description. But either way, still better than the multiple wooden spoons I've had broken over my ass.

ProTip: Asking 'was that supposed to hurt' will get a second spoon broken over your ass

[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

Oh boy, it was just me and my dad so.... just him running the show unfortunately.