Ask Lemmy

The last time I went back to visit my parents, I just sat in the living room and listened to the quiet. They're on the outskirts of a small town, and there is zero traffic. The house stays at the right temperature with no fans or other mechanical help. The nearest neighbor is much further away than at my suburban house.

Language. The dialect from home.

I miss the layout of my neighbourhood from when I was 5-10 years old.

I lived in one of the middle units of a 10 unit townhouse. Each had a ~30'x30' fenced in backyard that opened up to a large field and playground. The u-shaped roads that flanked this field and the houses along them left a large cross shaped grassy alley on either side of the field.

I'm not sure that description does it justice, but this setup created a huge amount of grassy space for the surrounding neighbourhood kids to run around in, while keeping them somewhat contained. There were only 3 entrances/exits to this neighbourhood that were pretty well supervised by parents, so the kids were able to roam a pretty big area without anyone having to worry. Something I've come to appreciate more with age.

It also meant a TON of snow to build and play with in the winter, without playing in the road :D 🇨🇦

Nothing. Small town country Australia wasn't a great place to grow up, and it's not a great place to go back to...

The quiet.

Went from living in a small rural town to an actual city. It's always loud af no matter what time of day or night.

Seems kind of silly...but the downtown started this tradition years back in coating the entire facade of the buildings in Christmas lights...not in a gaudy, cheesy way, but one single color per building. One shop would be blue and the shop next door would be red, etc. It started to become "known" in the area that this town would have the most lights ever in the downtown. They basically made a festival every year about it and more and more visitors seemed to come from out of town. And as time went on, more and more business neighboring the downtown started taking part. It looks amazing at night...every single building entirely lit up in a different color. I haven't seen it in years...I guess it'll be almost 10 at this point.

The place I grew up had three houses and was miles from the nearest shops.

Spent most of my childhood in the woods making dens and getting stoned.

I've ended up in Madrid, I miss the quiet. Like the no noise at all kinda quiet. On the other hand I don't miss the inconvenience of having to drive to go and get milk or a pack of skins or other mundane stuff.

Shops closing half day Wednesday and not open at all on the weekend - don't miss that either.

The dialects - miss those too

Pizza, bagels, knishes, Jewish delis, and whitefish salad.

I miss TexMex food.

The sunsets, and the smell after a rain.

Literally everything else can get fucked.

US -> Japan. Mostly, I miss family. I have basically no love for the area in which I grew up nor contact with anyone there (half my family never lived there, the other half moved to another state).

I do miss some foods that are hard to find or very expensive here. Things like PC parts are (or at least were) much cheaper in the US since it was generally a niche hobby device outside of business use here until quite recently.

I miss the night sky. Chicago has too much light pollution to see the stars.

I miss eating frybread.

I miss the arid climate, the open sky, and even the wild weather of South Dakota.

And I miss the tight-knit concert scene of Sioux Falls, where a core group of people went to every. single. show. no matter the genre or location or age because it was all we had. Years later touring bands who came up Chicago would still recognize me as "that headbanging guy" even after I cut my hair.

I really miss my family and friends. And also pulled pork.

Bagels (though now I make my own), fruit/veg, and Mexican food.

I moved to Germany from the USA and I now teach German to immigrants. The most universal experience for immigrants to Germany from warmer countries is the slow resignation not to even try peaches, corn, berries, or avocado (it’s reasonable based on geography, just still sad). I was astounded when my husband said he didn’t like peaches, but then I tried a German peach. They’re woody, flavorless, and expensive.

I'm from NYC. I miss good public transportation, museums, and nightlife.

Halloween. I grew up in the Boston area and absolutely loved the seasonal attractions.

The aphids singing on summer nights. That chorus really doesn't exist in other parts of the world and it's even hard to explain to people!

The food and the people

The memories, and not much else.

I think if you stay in a place your whole life, you don't really get how much it changes. Go away for a few years and come back, it's almost like a new place sometimes.

Every now and then I go on Google Maps, satellite view, and look at places I used to live. You see trash piled up everywhere. Cars everywhere. Three or four cars to a driveway in what used to be single family homes.

I know a lot of people who still live there. They haven't changed at all. Even as the trash piles up around them, they still think they're living in paradise. Especially now that weed's legal there. I think the government just said "fine, smoke a jay and delude yourself with our blessing." Shit should be legal everywhere, at least as long as more dangerous shit like cigarettes and alcohol are. I don't partake in any of it, I think it's all shit, but I think people should be free to do shit that harms no one. Maybe more limits on alcohol since drunk driving kills so many, and the problems caused by alcoholics... but I wouldn't push it.

Oh yeah, the weather's still pretty nice there. Temperate. But you couldn't pay me enough to live there now.

QuikTrip

Kansas City style BBQ

Cheez-Its

I live in Norway now and despite musing these things, wouldn’t trade them for my life now.

All the mom and pop restaurants I grew up with that have since closed.

Also knowing all the short cuts it took through the neighbor's yards to get home.

I moved from a decently sized city (100k inhabitants) to a small city (10k inhabitants) in a different country. I enjoy the more peaceful environment, but I miss being able to casually greet and talk with random strangers, as I don't know the language here and very few people here know English. It was so much easier to find events and things to do when I knew what everyone around me were talking about, and the posters were easy to read. I oftentimes find myself using a translating app, but it's a hassle, comparatively.

I miss the sandwiches. Every time I go back to Philly I eat too many.

Im from tulsa. When i was 21 my brother died. I moved away 2 weeks after the funeral. I cant go back there. Too many memories 😪

Being less than 10 miles from the beach no matter where in town I was. That said I have woods now and I like that just as much.

Edit: I do miss how many concerts were always happening. Guess I'll go play my banjo.

The weather. Moved from Southern California to the Pacific Northwest. I like it here, but even after three decades the winter gloom still gets to me.

We had a small restraunt similar to chipotle but like, way, way better. Nothing away from home even comes close, I miss that place.

I'm from Ft. Worth, TX and have lived in CT for 20 years and I couldn't put my finger on what exactly it was that I missed most about it until I went down there last year. It's the balmy evening breeze. Gets me every time.

The bicyclability

Feeling superior to everyone.

nothing. where i grew up was a hellhole of miserable people.

now i live in a major city and life is pretty great

The slim chance I'll see one of my school friends while it and about. There is not no way I'll see anyone I grew up with unless we plan to.

I used to live in a dense mega-city. Traffic and pollution aside, I miss how most things were reachable by walking or a short public transportation ride. A convenience store on every other corner, grocery store 5-10 min ride/drive away, and everything you need within a 4 mile radius.

Nothing. Village of 1400 people, the only "shop" was the bakery, no other commercial activity whatsoever, anywhere to spend money was concentrated in one nearby town (one supermarket, one movie theatre with one screen, some doctors, some construction trades) surrounded by several similarly dismal villages. Loads of disillusioned teens headed for dead-end jobs in the surrounding area or lifelong unemployment, and probably the extreme right. Everybody with a bit of brain left as soon as possible.

(I just tried to check the results of the most recent national elections - it's too tiny to have its results listed separately. They REALLY like conservatives down there.)

Nice landscape though, good for retirement you might think - until you learn that, since you left, all the doctors have moved away from the area, the teeny tiny hospital in that central town and the slightly larger one 30 minutes away by car have closed down and my parents now have to drive an hour (if traffic permits) to get to the hospital.

Gawwwd you made me think about that place, day ruined, thanks a lot....

Definitely the curry - cheap and really tasty. Also the moors are great to wander in a Wuthering Heights kinda way.

The familiarity. I knew where everything was. Businesses, places to go for leisure, outdoor activities, beach, skiing, whatever. I knew streets, neighborhoods, demographics, etc. Friends, the people I grew up with, where people lived… The very essence of what “roots” are.

I’ve moved so many times that I still don’t know 95% of the street names where I’ve lived for the last 5 years. I have to look online for businesses to see what is available and take a guess which one might work. Eating out someplace new is a risk, who knows if it’s any good.

That all said, leaving has presented far, far more opportunity and done better for me than staying in my hometown ever would have.

But I’m tired of moving. I need roots again. I miss that.

Family and the memories, I think. And the hills, and maybe some of the architecture. Otherwise, every time I go back, I’m glad that I left.