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Lairmore had testified that the sandwich “exploded all over” his chest and claimed he could smell mustard and onions. But a photo showed that the sandwich was still in its wrapper on the ground after it hit Lairmore in his bulletproof vest.
So he perjured himself, then? Surely something's going to come of that? No? Huh, okay, then.
If the sandwich did not split, you must acquit!
comment of the century.
You missed your calling in life. This comment would have blown up the legal world if said in court.
Im sad it wasn't done.
He also claimed he felt it through his Kevlar vest. Didn't know sandwiches are more powerful than bullets.
To be fair he was a little bitch, and little bitches feel everything.
There is a big difference between being able to feel something and being injured by it.
It hit him right in the fee fees, and badly damaged his already fwagile mascuwinity.
You need special plating to handle those sub-sonic sandwiches.
To be fair, while wearing one you can feel someone lightly patting you on the chest. I'm sure he did feel it but no way on earth did it hurt.
He also claimed he felt it through his Kevlar vest. Didn’t know sandwiches are more powerful than bullets.
Clearly this was a Subway sandwich with an armor piercing tungsten penetrator ingredient. Evidence submitted by the prosecution cited Subway corporation's recent advertising campaign featuring the slogan "I can't get enough of that tungsten!". This branding campaign was, of course, a backpedal from Subway's previous offering of a Depleted Uranium penetrator which was largely shunned by sandwich consumers as being 'unhealthy'. /s
So I was on a jury. The officer involved testified on some things that made it sound very bad for the defendant.
Then we saw the body cam of part the interaction. Technically what he said was true but extremely exaggerated. Made us discount everything he said that wasn't on video.
We ended thinking the defendant was probably guilty but they didn't prove it so we decided not guilty.
Thats how the jury i was on went but it was before body cams. Basically they said dude was "exchanging small packages for money" implying he was dealing drugs. The cops claimed he tossed the "small packages" when he drove off. They never collected these "small packages" so how do i know what they were?
We all thought dude was probably guilty but that the police work was too shoddy to convict. Cop looked pissed on the way out of court.
Cops do it constantly. TBH I'd chalk that level of bullshit up to them constantly using ChatGPT to write their reports now, except that they've been pulling the same bullshit forever and getting away with it nearly every single time.
I firmly believe that police officer testimony that can't be backed up by bodycam footage shouldn't even be admissible. There's essentially no reason for a cop to not have their bodycam turned on at all times unless they specifically chose to turn it off, so there's no reason we should have to accept testimony without it.
Wasn't there a case of police officers badly beating someone and then claiming his blood stains on their uniforms were destruction of police property or some such?
I'm not aware of that specific case, but yeah that tracks. I've read about incidents where the cops were enraged about things like victims of traffic accidents or assaults by officers being soaked in blood, getting it on them, and stating that they 'didn't want to risk getting hepatitis/AIDS' as justification for declining to provide lifesaving medical intervention. In some cases, the delay in care led to deaths, while they stood by, and weren't censured by their departments.
They've been using seizures from acute health incidents and tazers both as justification for escalation of force because "suspects were resisting" for quite a while.
it is actually worth pursuing that…
even just posting comments about that on every news video about it on youtube would help.
we have a rare combination of undeniable, clear video evidence vs. sworn testimony in court that is unambiguously a lie.
There’s no real wiggle room on that.
Why not call prosecutors and annoy them? Or send letters to the judge?
The fact that this guy had to go to court at all to defend himself is just asinine. These dumb fascist fucks are a bunch of thin skinned bullies.
Not really sure its because they are thin skinned. Its part of the facist playbook. You have to make an example of anyone that steps out of line.
This is clearly judicial harrassment ... this prosecutor is now likely to lose his job. If sandwich guy is smart he will sue about 4-5 different people/groups.
DC is practicing Jury Nullification ... wondering if the Juries there would steamroll these lawsuits forward.
Any time the prosecution wasted on this is time not spent on something else
I’m sorry you had to waste your time, but thank you for your service sub sandwich guy 🫡
Border Patrol Officer Greg Lairmore received two "gag gifts" related to the incident — a plush sandwich and a patch featuring a cartoon of Dunn throwing the sandwich with the words “Felony Footlong” — which the defense team argued showed this was not a serious event in his life.
That is amazing.
Did John Oliver send those?
Continuing the great American tradition of jury nullification
here's hoping Luigi and Tyler get off too for the same reason.
It’s actually pretty insane that this has happened, what, twice now in only a few weeks, both cases related to the fed occupations. I can’t even remember the last time an acquittal like this happened before that, though I don’t follow this stuff closely. I think OJ is the last one I’m aware of but that’s obviously a totally different situation. I was definitely expecting s different outcome, but good for him. I remember in the video they called him “Superman”, lol. I guess so!
The jury — which feasted on sandwiches for lunch Thursday, according to a person familiar with jury lunches — deliberated the charges for several hours Wednesday and Thursday before delivering the verdict.
Is that jury tampering? Lol
Every day goes by seeing this in the news and I am reminded of child criminal Brendon Chaney.
WARNING: This kid is a criminal
You forgot to mention the part where he yelled, "Eat my shorts!", before riding off on his skateboard.
🎶There goes my hero... Watch him as he throws! 🎵
Soooo... We PAID for this B.S. We paid for the arrest, check the number of uniformed tax-payer funded officers. We paid for the prosecution, we paid for the court, we paid for the jury, we paid and paid AFTER the famously sandwich-indicting Grand Jury wouldn't touch this case.
Somehow it feels like the DA should be relieved of their duties.
🎵🎶There goes my gyro
If the sandwhich don’t fit you must acquit!
Ahahaha, what a hero
I picture the jury savoring their lunch sandwich and one of them being like, "So... not guilty?". Everyone nods and goes back to working on their sandwich.
Why is there an FBI guy there? Also, masks off when arresting, very weird.
They treated his arrest like the guy was a dangerous criminal mastermind with a small army in his apartment with him. I don't think they were exactly thinking ~~properly~~ at all.
Trump will give him a Purple Heart for "surviving a sub attack with mustard-based WMDs". Semper Fudge
