No one ever asks me to join the Illuminati. ๐
this post was submitted on 27 Oct 2025
42 points (88.9% liked)
Ask Lemmy
35334 readers
4322 users here now
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I know. I feel so lucky I was chosen to help lead the world shadow government. It truly is an honor.
Woah woah woah. Slow down, there. You weren't selected to lead, just to join. You gotta work your way up!
I think they forgot to tell you that you aren't supposed to talk about it. You're not very good at the "shadowy" part.
I never get paid in gum...
Maybe you'd like to join me for some Lou Malnati's?
No one ever asks me
FOMO?
they see something great in you, but can't tell if you're a doctor or a pilot?
They go by vibes not on facts.
I am even better I am retired and have no real skills.
You are simply description and so have been provided with a rank of Register in the illuminati, what's hard to understand?
Also, this is a secret organization, I didn't think someone as description as you would post about it openly
I am an agent of one of the headquarters of the Illuminati organizations, but you can call me the fediverse chick!
Some stupid group a child made, or they're targeting people they think are naive enough to fall for a grift by telling them they're super special and unique.
It's concerning you don't immediately disregard spam messages like that, that's exactly who they're looking to grift.
Thanks for giving some fucks about my mental state.
Yeah, view it as a learning experience, but you knew enough to ask instead of going along with it. Which is great.
The people who fall for scams are the ones too embarrassed to ask when they're not sure.
But in general, any unsolicited messages hyping you up and saying how great you are, is just fishing for people with low self esteem who will ignore red flags in favor of warm and fuzzy feelings.
I have plenty low self-esteem but I know bullshit when I smell it and I am sure it is a grift and I am too tight wit my money to give it to anyone. My mutual funds are giving me 8 to 10 percent annually so why would I even consider this bullshit. I just found it amusing that this reddit cam crap is making over to here.
hello its us the illuminati. Yes, the entire organization are currently sitting in a pool party inviting you to our secret society. We can control everything from up to large governments all the way to you. Yes you, see now you're breathing manually. Now you're also blinking manually. Now you're smiling. Is this a coincidence? No.
We are inviting you a chance to partake in our society. If you're interested, all you need to do is draw a pentagram using cow blood, light a candle in its center and follow the next steps from the summoned devil.
(vegans can substitute blood with %100 pomegranate juice, do not substitute with different animal/juice as it may lead to summoning other entities, we the illuminati are not responsible any way if this occurs)
It makes me cringe to think that many people have egos large enough that this would work to scam them out of the inevitable registration fee that will be asked for over whatsapp.
Hi, this is your friendly neighborhood Nigerian Prince. Pls send me 100 bitcoinz, and when I secure my kingdom, I will repay you 10x in kind.
Sounds like the setup to a scam
I am sure it is. I did not expect it here so fast.
Guess you haven't been here for Nicole.
I seem to remember something about her thinking back to my old account.
First day on the internet?
I can tell it is not your first day being a smart ass.
It is a valid question. I don't understand the punt of this post. If you already know it's a scam then you made a post waiting for people to tell you what you already knew. If you didn't know it was a scam, then you were expecting us to go "yeah, that is the well known real illuminati account, lucky you" which is naive at best.
Pre edit: I have to do some spell checking but if I stop writing this reply to check it now, I'll lose the post and the comment, so I'll post as is and fix later. Sorry
I'm still waiting for the spell checking.
Man, I wanna be recruited to the Illuminati...
This is a scam.
If your I.Q. is over 150, and you have $3,125.00 (plus handling), you might be eligible for a trial membership in the A.I.S.B. If you think you qualify, put the money in a cigar box and bury it in your backyard. One of our Underground Agents will contact you shortly.
Got one, too. I was more annoyed that they assumed I was a child who hadn't already obtained a career.