What is the charge?! Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?
this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2025
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What is the charge?! ~~Eating~~ Boofing a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?
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(1 replies)
Sir, sir! mastication before masterbation.
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(1 replies)
First they came for the spring rolls...
Then I came for the spring rolls
Actually, they first came for anal beads, chess scandal :3
You’re saying I should make anal beads from spring rolls?
Way ahead of you.
And I said "Hey, I was stuffing those up my ass!! Get your own!"
And I stayed silent because I wasn't a spring roll
Literally 1984
Why? Why shouldn't I put a spring roll up me bum?
Funniest meme of the day.
Because it offends everyone else at the Chinese buffet.
You need spring rolls with flared bases for that.
Nah, it's fine. It's digestible so you'll just pass it out the other end if you lose hold of it.
My spring rolls, my choice.
Why so strict? Let loose a little, give the choice to put juicy Asian rolls up you butt to someone else ...
💢**MY FUCKING SPRING ROLLS, MY FUCKING CHOICE, GODDAMMIT!**💢
(Much amgery stomping noises ~fading off into the distance~)
[DOOR SLAMS VIOLENTLY, KNOCKING SEVERAL DECORATIVE DISHES FROM THEIR DISPLAY STANDS. END OF SCENE.]
Lest I checked, this was a free country
I mean... I'm trying to be snarky, but I'm finding it hard to argue that it's bad advice.
Other people in the restaurant?
Me asking the delivery person to "feed" them to me?
One too many springs in my bum causes me to bounce?
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(1 replies)
Patients are warning doctors to mind their own business
Good to know, I was sitting on the fence about this. Funny enough, the doctor said I shouldn't be boofing fenceposts either, but I'll wait until there's a consensus on that, I think.
DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO SCIENCE MAN.
The only thing you should put in your anus is your elbow.
No, wait, that's ears.
The only thing you should put in your anus is your ear.
No, no, that's still not right.
The only think you should put in your anus is something with a flared base.*
*If you're worrying about whether your boyfriend's penis has a flared base and you can't find a tape measure, recall that most penises are not readily detachable, and most boyfriends have hips wider than their penis, so you're in the clear.
If you're worried that this advice doesn't apply simply because you don't have a boyfriend, there's an app for that.
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(1 replies)
With a pic of the perfect girth of spring rolls lmao
(Also 69th comment 🤙)
Health and safety gone mad
I can do whatever I want >:(
I'm a bit upset people would do that with such good food.
AI or Stupid humans?
Sellouts.
MAHA says veggies are important.
About 10 years ago, I went out at the beginning of the summer to buy a few fresh pool noodles, and couldn't find them anywhere. It was that way all summer.
The next summer, they were everywhere, but now they all had a tag or sticker attached, saying "Do not insert in rectum."
So there were no pool noodles for an entire summer, because some guy saw one, and couldn't resist the compulsion to stick it up his ass.
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