this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2025
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Fucking read receipts (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 weeks ago by Stamets@lemmy.world to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 60 points 2 weeks ago (9 children)

I know we're here for the joke, but can I be real for a minute:

There is absolutely no reason to have read receipts on and everyone should turn them off. You gain nothing from seeing someone has seen a message. You want a reply....wait for a reply. You gain absolutely nothing from letting others know you've seen a message. Try turning off read receipts for a little while. I guarantee your life will be better and you may never turn them on again.

The only exception is my wife. I find it useful to know she's seen the shopping list I've sent her, even if she didn't get a chance to reply. But then again, she's the only one I've convinced to use Signal, so she's in a separate app and I can keep read receipts on just for her.

Pro level next step:

Try turning off notifications. Put messaging app notifications to silent, minimised and never on lock screen. If there's something urgent then someone will phone up. We all check our phones often enough to see the message badge soon enough. Silencing the endless pings of alerts will give you a serenity you may have never experienced before. Try it.

[–] Egonallanon@feddit.uk 12 points 2 weeks ago

I'm with you I turned off read receipts and muted all group chats I'm in a while ago and it's done wonders for how on edge I feel. So much calmer than I was before.

[–] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 weeks ago

I’m with you on this. I have very few notifications enabled, and read receipts are off on my end (except signal, where like you I only have 2 contacts, and I don’t mind them knowing that I flaked to hell on replying, because they are also neurospicy or intimate partners, and we just have a sort of understanding that as long as we are still close, it’s fine to leave stuff until you can handle it.)

It’s really liberating. I can read texts and then set them back to unread so I know I need to follow up, but nobody else knows I’ve even seen it.

I genuinely wouldn’t be able to turn off notifications tho, not entirely.. I absolutely do not look at my phone enough to see the badges. Even with notifications on and set to re-alert 3x, I miss a ton of shit because I try not to use my phone much anymore (I doom scroll too much and video games are better for my health even if they are full of war crimes and sort of fucked morals like rimworld.

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 weeks ago

I have mine turned on for my partner and nobody else. I also have my location turned on for my partner and nobody else. I love and trust my partner more than anyone in the world, we have no secrets from each other, and knowing where my phone is and when I’ve seen their texts has been invaluable before!

But everyone else on earth, nah. If my parents asked me to turn that stuff on, honestly, I would (I’m old and have an extemely good relationship with my parents) but they’ve never asked about that. My parents do have read receipts enabled on their end, because they’re even older than me lawl

[–] FrChazzz@lemmus.org 6 points 2 weeks ago

I did all of this years ago and it is bliss lol

Another thought about read receipts, can’t spammers and phishing scammers use those to determine if a number is active in order to send more trash?

[–] jaggedrobotpubes@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Fuck yeah tell it like it is

[–] TragicNotCute@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Let me give you my perspective and the reason I turn them on.

It builds accountability. I want to be a timely replier of texts, but sometimes I fail. Even worse, sometimes I open it and forget to reply at all. This forces me to leave them unread until I’m ready to address them. I know the sender will see that I have read them, so it incentivizes me to manage my texting better.

[–] zout@fedia.io 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

My perspective: If it's urgent, don't text me, it's called a phone. If you do text me, you accept that I will answer it when it suits me. Even if I have read the text already.

[–] Dave@lemmy.nz 5 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah if I've read it and not responded, you're not getting a response. I forgot as soon as I looked away.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

accountability for responding to texts? i am not "accountable" for responding to a text immediately. that's some gen alpha bullshit

[–] angband@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

haha, clue into me missing weeks worth of messages with noone the wiser. Mostly worth it. slowly learning to pay attention again.

[–] Eheran@lemmy.world -4 points 2 weeks ago

Stop acting as of you speak for everyone, super annoying. Turn it off if you do not want it. Very easy.

[–] PunnyName@lemmy.world 39 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I was using that unread text notification as a reminder. Fuck!

[–] CaptainBlagbird@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Jap, the only way my ADHD can deal with long texts (or those where I have to check actively check sonething, or Film out a doodle etc).

Now you've got to drop anything else and commit to it right now; or annoy the other person by writing "remind me again tonight"

[–] NiHaDuncan@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Or just set a reminder.

I used to just set alarms but then there’d be a 50% chance I wouldn’t remember what it was set for.

[–] CaptainBlagbird@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Oh that wouldn't work for me. Alarms would pop up exactly at the wrong moment (maybe when I'm on the toilet etc) and after dismissing they're out of sight out of mind. I need something that stays pinned until I can actually actively do it. (And snoozing would drive crazy.)

[–] Cordyceps_cereal@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

Fucking fuck!!! It's the only way I can keep track!

[–] BroBot9000@lemmy.world 39 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Just disable that trash. Nobody is entitled to your time and attention whenever they want. It’s also fucking creepy

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I didn't know anyone left that on. Why would anyone want that on?

[–] eneff@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think it is really useful to be able to tell that someone has seen a message and recieved the information within, without them having to write a pro forma reply.

This really doesn't have to be an issue, if your social circle has reasonable expectations and people aren't insecure enough to guilt trip you because of it.

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Doesnt have to be an issue no. Neither do bathroom doors or clothes, but I still prefer those as well. It's a to each their own thing.

[–] eneff@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 week ago

this is a false equivalence

[–] Jessica@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

I missed the part about read receipts, and I thought this was about being ADHD.

I leave text messages unread as a reminder to do something like pick up a medication and then accidentally read the message sometimes. Oh shit indeed

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

There's now a 1 in 3 chance we're going on a ride!

[–] itslilith@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 weeks ago

turn off read receipts, easy

and any decent messenger can mark chats as unread, so if you're using it as a reminder, just do that

[–] Pulptastic@midwest.social 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Of course a Loki would avoid reading a text to prevent sending a read receipt.

[–] tophneal@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 weeks ago

a proper Loki would know to turn off read receipts

[–] theskyisfalling@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 2 weeks ago

collapsed inline media

[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 5 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Really wish I could turn them off. I have two people immediately come to mind where if they see I read it they will guilt me for not responding immediately.

One of them now also lurks at my online status on steam. I can be playing a role playing game or anything and they won't care, in their mind I'm free to hang out right then.

[–] otacon239@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago

Set yo boundaries yo! I agree with what others are saying here. Turn them off! No one needs to know if you’ve read jack. And if I had someone skulking online status and expected me to be available based on that, I’d nip that in the bud quick. I’m available when I respond and say I’m available. Otherwise, tough luck.

You are the only one in control of your availability. Let others know.

[–] jaggedrobotpubes@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

That's what telling people to go fuck themselves is for.

You decide when you message. Not them.

[–] SolarMonkey@slrpnk.net 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Trying to sort out of this is a xena meme or a marvel meme..

I’m sort of guessing marvel? But it looks cheesy like xena.. maybe it’s neither?

[–] turtlesareneat@discuss.online 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Sir Anthony Hopkins recorded this still for the purposes of the meme, and we salute him for it. He then played a 66-minute piano concerto for his cat.

[–] SolarMonkey@slrpnk.net 1 points 2 weeks ago

That sounds legit. Thanks for the info.

[–] Stamets@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Its from a Thor movie, not sure which one off hand.

[–] 9bananas@feddit.org 1 points 2 weeks ago

pretty sure it's thor:ragnarök