You forgot the lack of mass ecological destruction and toxic levels of fertilizer with the mini golf
this post was submitted on 20 Jul 2025
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Fake grass isn’t great either, but at least it’s a slower poison than… well, poison.
An its tiny. Less than most parking spaces.
And mini golf takes up a far smaller footprint
i lived in Aberdeen, birthplace of golf.
it's such a different experience there.
practically everyone golfs, all ages/genders/ethnicities, families, friends, neighbours, working class, poor, rich...
Golf grass grows naturally there and doesn't need extra water.
people just walk to the closest golf course.
Electric buggies are banned in most courses, in a game you can end up walking a few km, actual outdoor exercise.
it's so different than the rest of the world, where it is upperclass or upperclass pretending, beers in electric buggies, expensive clubhouses...
all that, and regular golf is incredibly wasteful with water. it's sickening. plus the fact that it's a historically racist as fuck sport, fuck golf, fuck golfers. Oh and they expect their neighbors to subsidize their hobby (see muni golf courses) - get fucked
Boomers when someone wants to build a playground or a skatepark: "Noooo, that's communism!"
Boomers asking the local government to subsidize their useless ass golf course: "Our community"
yuuuup
What sport isn't historically racist?
Roller derby?
Nice, I hadn't thought of that. Might actually not have a history of racism
Yep. Started by punks, so late enough by cool enough people.
NASCAR
The one with the noose hanging in the one black guys out garage?
Ullamaliztli?
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No, don't first date mini golf unless you want them to know how you look incredibly frustrated and on the verge of chucking a club at a fucking windmill.
It honestly wouldn't be so bad if there weren't so fucking many golf courses.
If there were 25 golf courses per US state, we would have 1250 golf courses - or less than 10% of the number we currently have.
I guess the rich don't want to have to share a space with the filthy middle class, or something.
Balls are only white
You don't have to use a white ball for regular golf. But it does make it harder to see dark colors like red, blue or green.
Also: There should be at least 1 MegaGolf course. It's like minigolf, with the goofy obstacles and shit, but it's the size of a normal golf course. So you still gotta hit the ball through a clown's mouth or a windmill, but they are now 150-300 yards away.
I used Callaway soft green balls, I find them so easy to see compared to any other colour ball including white.
The great thing about golf, either mini or fullsize, is that you never have to play either of them. I don't.
If I remember George Carlins bit correctly the amount of golf courses in the US took up two rhode islands and a delaware worth of space once counted up. He argued we should turn it into homeless shelters and public housing, and to let the golfers test actual skill at the mini-golf. Actually looking at it semantically I wonder if the word mini-golf exist just to demean it compared to big boy real golf.
Let's start calling it skill golf instead of miniature golf
I don’t play except once every couple of years... and poorly. But it isn't as wasteful on water as you think. They often use some form of recycled water, and once it is on the ground it doesn't just go away. Much of it goes deeper into the ground, getting filtered naturally, and ends up back in an underground aquifer. The "loss" is just in evaporation. Which of course eventually comes back as rain. Some percentage of that ends up in the ocean. That part is more or less lost as drinkable water. But recycled water often wasn't drinkable to start with.
It's really the fertalizers that are the problem I believe.
I was an irrigation tech at a 27 hole golf course a while back. We had the reclaim system you're talking about and a retention lake that we would pull from. During the winter (Florida) it was pretty close to a stable system. There wasn't much loss to evaporation and our lake didn't need to be refilled. During the summer and especially in droughts, more than half our water was city water supplementing our lake. We would pump about 1 million gallons of water per night normally. In the summer and drought seasons it could be closer to 2 million per night and half of that was city water. We were a smaller course too, some of the PGA 36 hole courses could easily double those numbers. Golf courses are a blight on the land and a giant waste of all kinds of resources.
27 hole is not small. The majority of courses out there are 9 or 18. And the recycled water I was talking about came from outside the course. Usually part of the waste water system in the area. That's probably less common in Florida though. I am amzed you could be stable in the winter. I didn't know reclimation could be that effective.
My mistake, I hadn't considered the recycled water would be supplied by the city like that. Where I was it was mostly retention ponds like I mentioned. As for being stable in winter, that really depended on rain. If we got a decent rain a few times a month it would mostly even out, but even then we still needed topping off from time to time.
Yeah, even though they can treat sewage enough to make it safe to drink, most people don't want to anyway. So they often send it to golf courses, water features, sometimes very large companies will use it if they have a lot of grass on thier campuses. It's just a matter of piping it most of the time because they can't just release the sewage untreated, so it's there for the taking. But piping isn't cheap if it is an urban area.
Lots of golf courses also use or are part of the waste water system in the area.
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The most minigolf i played was a flash game on nitrome, mallet mania yes, it was very basic but it has a certain something to that...
The 101 Dalmatians mini golf game for the PS2 was a staple of our household when I was a child
I spent a ton of time playing the nabisco minigolf flash game online as a kid.
What about top golf
Top golf ruins the skyline of every city that has one
Feel free to form your own opinion, but I've only ever heard good things about Top Golf and it's not a massive drain on resources or space like traditional golf courses are. But I also enjoy golfing at public golf courses from time to time. It's fun to get out on the course with 3 of my buddies to whack a ball and have some beers outside. Never will consider a private membership or course though. Private golf courses can be burned to the ground for all I care.
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Tech bros and corpo sales drones trying to throw a "hip" pizza party where people can see them get out of their beemers and where they can pretend to have hobbies and souls by being "fun."
Or
Cookie cutter, middle class grind culture mating grounds where people dress up to get drunk overpaying for booze while they fail to hit a golf ball and post about how zany they are on the gram'
Or
Overpriced, multi-story driving range.
I worked at a Topgolf for a little over a year, and it is incredible how much some companies will spend on corporate events there
Mini golf FTW!
The real problem is the children and the noise they make.
He charged the ranks of the goblins of Mount Gram in the Battle of the Green Fields, and knocked their king Golfimbul's head clean off with a wooden club. It sailed a hundred yards through the air and went down a rabbit-hole, and in this way the battle was won and the game of Golf invented at the same moment.
Play golf the way it was originally intended and you'll never be confused about whether or not it's a sport ever again.
Worth trying disc golf. Most courses are built on under utilized park land funded and maintained by local volunteer clubs. You can get three discs for $30-40 or most loan some from somebody who plays (we all have too many) and get started!
Most courses are free to play.
past time
FTLoG.
Golf is so fucking dumb.
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