this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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This is assuming it's sealed and has a proper stamp. Post cards are more expensive than cheese. And who doesn't like cheese right?

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[–] protist@mander.xyz 90 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago) (5 children)

This would be prohibited by the USPS:

5 Perishable Matter

51 Definition

511 General Definitions

Perishable matter is anything that can deteriorate in the mail and thereby lose value, create a health hazard, or cause an obnoxious odor, nuisance, or disturbance, under ordinary mailing conditions. Mailable perishable matter may be sent at the mailer’s own risk when it is packaged as required and when it can be delivered within appropriate and reasonable time limits to prevent deterioration. Examples of perishable matter include mailable types of live animals, food items, and plants.

Full list of prohibited items

[–] spittingimage@lemmy.world 13 points 9 hours ago

American cheese doesn't look like it'll ever deteriorate.

[–] stu42j@lemm.ee 12 points 14 hours ago (2 children)

Does Kraft "cheese" really count as food though?

[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 19 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

I'm going to die on this hill: Cheeses like this are real food. Typically real cheese is one of if not the first ingredient. They are made from cheese, milk, and an emulsifying agent. It's literally cheese sauce with a higher melting point. You can make it yourself it's really easy, you can use non standard cheeses for it like provolone or Gouda, and the only real difference would be in preservatives

[–] protist@mander.xyz 9 points 10 hours ago

You're absolutely right about this. It's super easy to take a block of high-quality cheddar cheese and melt it with some sodium citrate to make the creamiest cheese dip you've ever eaten. And you can make your own sodium citrate with just lemon juice and baking soda

[–] TheRealKuni@midwest.social 5 points 11 hours ago

And deli style American cheeses, with lower milk content and thus a firmer, more cheese-like consistency, make the perfect cheese for a good burger. Melty but not stringy.

[–] protist@mander.xyz 7 points 14 hours ago

It's certainly perishable, doesn't have to be food

[–] TokenEffort@sh.itjust.works 2 points 10 hours ago

Yet people received their Pink sauce...

[–] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 2 points 14 hours ago

Interesting. So the potato thing is technically against their rules, but they just do it anyways I guess?

[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 1 points 12 hours ago

was going to say perishable was the first thing that came to my mind.

[–] ptz@dubvee.org 20 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago)

TL;DR: Probably not illegal, but I doubt the post office would accept it.

Answering this off-the-cuff with no research, but probably not illegal per se (more of a dick move).

A slice of cheese, wrapped or not, definitely would not make it through the sorting equipment intact, would likely melt in the trucks, and would absolutely stink up the place for the postal workers.

Edit: That said, there are classes of items that are prohibited in the mail, and this may fall under one of those. Like I said, I'm answering w/o any research whatsoever and focusing more on the logistics of it.

[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 16 points 17 hours ago

You can use any piece of cardstock. I used to cut rectangles out of cereal boxes and use those.

I think it does have to be cardstock or similar weight, though; cheese might not meet the requirements.

[–] gonzo-rand19@moist.catsweat.com 11 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

It'll be all torn up inside one of the machines, probably rip open the package and create a bunch of plastic shreds, and ruin the day of one of their equipment technicians. USPS is not easy on lettermail, their equipment manhandles it.

Just use the back of a cereal box or something.

[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 6 points 15 hours ago (2 children)

You misunderstand.

This isn't a question about making a post card, this is a question about mailing cheese.

[–] gonzo-rand19@moist.catsweat.com 3 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

is it illegal to use a single serve wrapped slice of Kraft cheese as a postcard?

It is literally a question of making a postcard.

[–] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world -1 points 13 hours ago

🤦🏻‍♂️

[–] Goretantath@lemm.ee 1 points 13 hours ago

Its going through the mail system with only a stamp on it, its acting as a postcard. Will be shreded inside the sorting machines.

[–] Kookie215@lemmy.world 11 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I remember seeing that people can write the address on a potato and the USPS will deliver it if it has the right amount of stamps, so I suppose its possible. Definitely not "illegal" but the chances it gets thrown in the trash are high.

[–] Goretantath@lemm.ee 2 points 13 hours ago

Its funny because thats technically against their rules but they do ship em.

[–] litchralee@sh.itjust.works 10 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

At the very minimum, this type of mail would incur the $0.46 non-machinable surcharge because it's smaller than one of the minimum USPS dimensions for postcards, namely that one side has to be at least 5 inches (127 mm exact). You may also have issues with it being too floppy for basic handling by the postal carrier, especially if it was previously left in a warm mailbox.

But perhaps a more practical issue may arise first: will stamps even adhere to the wrapping of a Kraft Cheese single? If you cannot affix postage, that's the most immediate impediment.

[–] Tramort@programming.dev 7 points 16 hours ago

It's legal. Which probably means that ICE will show up at your door, break in without a warrant, and deport you to a central American prison because you tried.

[–] sunbrrnslapper@lemmy.world 6 points 16 hours ago

Unknown. My aunt once mailed me a coconut (in its husk). Just gotta get the postage right...

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 5 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago)

are you being cheesy op? if your postcard isn't rejected, will arrive at 10 different destinations

[–] i_am_not_a_robot@feddit.uk 3 points 15 hours ago (1 children)
[–] POTOOOOOOOO@reddthat.com 1 points 8 hours ago

Good read, thanks