HELLO. YOU’VE BEEN SELECTED AS…(raspy trucker voice) “Da next Pope”…PRESS 1 TO ACCEPT. PRESS 2 TO SPEAK TO A CARDINAL.
this post was submitted on 25 Apr 2025
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Ugh not again, it's so much paperwork to fix this.
...was jd vance responsible for the death of the pope?....just asking questions...
You mean Justkilled Dapope Vance?
Swiss Guard 1 : "Hey, should we look up what 'JD' stands for before letting him meet the Supreme Pontiff ? You think it could be relevant ?"
Swiss Guard 2 : "Nah..."
He cast the cantrip “Vampiric Touch”.
The Pope was low on HP
Hilarious, if true.
Unfortunately the calling party can show whatever they want for the caller number, there's no validation that it's true.
TTV_Francis_4K_noscope has respawned.
We've been trying to reach you concerning your Vatican's extended warranty...
It covers you for eternity.
Pope is not dead. He's locked in the cellar and was able to get his hands on a broken phone that was only capable to call your number with very limited battery. He got the phone by beating guard to death with his food bowl.
... and you missed it.
And he's a time traveler, it seems, since the call is dated to 2021
When the call comes. You take it!!!!