No Stupid Questions
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Im curious what could come off as a joke to you but would offend a trans person but not offend other (similarly aged) people.
If your joke might be offensive to anyone, its probably best to save it for outside of the workplace if you share it at all.
Not saying dont make any jokes, just that your jokes shouldn't be referencing someones gender or appearance or at the expense of someone else in general.
Its impossible to know if your joke might be offensive to others when you live different lifestyles.
It's like telling people not to serve food that might be prohibited by the religion of one of their dinner guests when they have never interacted with the religion before.
What OP does here is trying to educate himself, which is the right move, in my opinion.
I get where you’re coming from, and we’ve all seen bad faith “advice” seeking (sea lioning), but also most of us have interacted with people who are well-meaning yet know they have tons of learned behaviors they’ve never needed to question.
For example, a friend had a boss in a male-dominated industry (construction) who, at the end of a client lunch with several cis men, bid them farewell with “bye ladies.” When they were back in the car she called him out on it “is ‘ladies’ supposed to imply something?” and he immediately admitted “dammit I know. I’m sorry.”
She knew he knew as he said it that it wasn’t the right thing and just hadn’t considered it before, but it took situations like that to make him consider it in advance. And it sounds like he did. She said he began to make eye contact to check his wording in meetings, which she took to indicate it being present in his mind, that he was actually trying.
I’m just saying asking and trying to consider little things in advance is ally behavior and should be encouraged unless it’s obviously in bad faith.
I didnt think the poster was in bad faith, i was just genuinely curious as im not really around environments like that these days so i kind of assumed it would be something sexist or creepy.
Ah understood. From the conscientious wording, I would guess that’s the sort of stuff they worked on quite a few years ago. But I’m wrong often enough, good looking out.
That's not good advice. Any joke can be offensive to someone - especially when people are committed to being offended.