this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2025
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My recent ones aren't very serious but they've been living rent free.

Coworker called me a tech racoon because I don't throw computer shit away.

Other was another coworker mentioning that people that like purple really like it. Making me go "fuck" everytime I find a new purple thing in my home. Think I'm up to 30+ 🙃

What about you?

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[–] Jimbabwe@lemmy.world 42 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Circa 1991 I stole my classmate’s pen and he noticed and confronted me immediately. A few kids were circled around, watching it go down. I tried to lie and say it was mine and he said “Oh yeah, what special feature does it have, then?” And I, scrambling, said “It has.. purple ink!” That was true, but he was the pen’s true owner and not buying that shit. He snatched it out of my hand and did.. something with it that I didn’t quite understand. He slammed the butt end of it down into the palm of his hand and it clicked or something. I dunno. Either way, case closed.

If your name is Corey and you went to Pond Springs Elementary and had Mrs. Olsen as a 5th grade teacher, I’m sorry I tried to steal your pen.

[–] NoSpotOfGround@lemmy.world 22 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

I had a similar thing with a pen, the very same year I think... I had a mildly special pen which one day I lost. Went looking for it and found it sitting on a (slightly older) classmate's desk, so i grabbed it and said "hey, that's mine". He tried to pretend that no, it was his, and he sounded very convincing about it, and even got the teacher involved. They both looked at me with infuriatingly condescending expressions as I explained how it was mine.

The teacher suggested "just let him have it" to the classmate, who conceded.

I went back to my desk fuming and scratched my initials into it before returning to show them, "look, see, it was mine! The classmate immediately pointed out "you scratched those in just now" and I think I mumbled something incoherent before going back to my desk, to the teacher's mortification with the whole situation.

It had already begun dawning on me at this point that the classmate was right... That wasn't my pen. It was his and just looked like mine. But it was too late at this point and I didn't know how to handle it other than to keep quiet and try to forget about it.

[–] Jimbabwe@lemmy.world 15 points 3 days ago

Haha, your poor teacher is the real victim here.

The initials scratching play was gutsy considering how utterly unnecessary it was.

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 3 days ago

Ugh I was the other person in both of your scenarios. I had a scintillating shiny rainbow pencil that this dickhead in my class took one day. I saw him writing with it and said “hey, that’s mine!” He protested and said it was his.

It literally had my name on it, embossed in gold lettering.

I called our teacher over, and by then he had scraped my name off by rubbing it against the desk. I told the teacher that my name USED to be there, but he had scraped it off.

She told me there’s no way to prove he didn’t bring it in, and let him keep it.

I had a big pack of them that was gifted to me, so it wasn’t REALLY that big of a deal. BUT THE PRINCIPLE OF IT ALL