this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2025
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"It's not a principle if it doesn't cost you anything"

Also just curious about your deeply held principles in general.

No political grandstanding please.

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[–] FRYD@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

It’s really not a healthy way to live. Plenty of people have told me to cut back on it, including two therapists. I’ve kinda understood that view, but I get stuck at the question of who is worth being there for and who isn’t.

[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

but I get stuck at the question of who is worth being there for and who isn’t.

I think YOU are worth being there for. If those interactions are taking a mental or emotional toll on you to have, then why are these abusive and toxic people from your past "worth it" and you aren't?

If instead you can have these interactions totally detached from yourself and you are strong and confident mentally an emotionally where there is no cost to you, then I don't see a problem with continuing.

[–] FRYD@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 minutes ago

Yeah, I get what you’re saying. My therapist has said something similar. That said, these things will never have no emotional toll. Nothing in life is free. To be totally detached isn’t being there for someone and that wouldn’t be the right way to handle these situations either.

I appreciate the advice and the time you spent on it, but I do what I do because it’s what the person I want to be would do. Until I don’t want to be the kind of person that cares about even the people that have done wrong by me, I’m gonna keep doing it. I still live my life, pursue my goals, and take care of myself. I just sacrifice a little energy and peace of mind for the people in my life that need it when they need it.