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This is so far over my head - i don't understand it. I know my comment will likely be taken as offensive or condescending, but it's really not the intent. I am so confused by sexuality/gender discussions. I don't understand having a label that's inclusive or exclusive of who someone will or won't date. Doesn't that change based on the people you meet? If you label one way, you meet someone you find attractive, you have chemistry, and then you find that they have parts that don't fit your label, what do you do? I guess it's part of dating - to weed out what you're usually not attracted to? I partnered/married young, so that aspect of dating wasn't openly discussed in the same way- we didn't have the common words to describe like we have today. Also, being hetero and having mostly hetero friends, i guess we didn't spend time thinking about how our relationships were similar or different from each others. I definitely understand putting descriptions of any kind of love out there so young people know they're not alone, but beyond that I'm lost.
Using labels for attraction and gender is a way to bring people closer together and share communities and issues. It's not limited to dating, though obviously it helps to find people who fit each other's attraction. "Oh you're pan? That's awesome, I'm gay and this is my boyfriend!" / "I heard Stacy is single, let's hook her up with Jane, tee hee" / "Does anyone know where I can find a gender-neutral restroom at the airport?"