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I'm a bit confused about your point here. It doesn't seem to address the question and in general I'm not sure what you're trying to say
like that other person said "it's all in your head". Yeah? Ok let's take from the other direction. the head believes it's under attack somehow or like anxiety and then people are somehow supposed to be like it "can't" affect the rest of the body? like "get a grip on urself". How??
Maybe I get it. I'm going to try to make an example and I'll hope you can tell me how I misunderstood. An example might be someone with high anxiety having panic attacks but the people around them are the really empathetic and as time goes on they get irritated (since they aren't too empathetic) so the end result is them saying things like "its all in your head" or "get a grip on yourself". In this fake example I'm guessing both groups would get triggered quickly from person they just met that has attributes from the old group. It was tough to frame this in a way that seemed realistic to me but wasn't really harsh on one group, sorry if I've missed the mark there or completely misunderstood.
In that situation, I think everyone still (usually) thinks that if the person with anxiety got a cold their body would still affect their mind and they would get grumpier and more worried. They probably wouldn't show much care and if they were throwing around quick phrases about it being in your head then they would keep saying it, but I don't think it would be because of some logic that the body is independent of the mind.
Am I close to understanding, or just really misunderstanding something here?
no but that's my point, like... i THOUGHT people weren't actually going around thinking that the mind is separate from the body like the brain isn't totally connected to everything. Like people were just using the phrase cuz it makes sense. but i realized the "Pull Yourself Up from The Bootstraps" people really actually think that it is just mind over matter. Or even bring up free will and suddenly everyone's like "noooo my mind is unaffected by the conditions of the body" and so on.
This might have come up today in a few pages of the novel I'm reading. The main character in the book has a lot of intrusive thoughts and there is a part where they read someone's blog that has similar thoughts. Anyway, I still don't know your situation, but I thought I'd put the name of the book here incase its helpful to someone:
"Turtles all the way down" by John Green
Its also a movie by the same name
Okay, I think I understand now.
That's understandable in that situation but as someone that wasn't in that situation I was just really slow to understand what you meant.
And it's not like the mind doesn't have power over the body (at the very least good / bad spirits make pain easier / harder to deal with) but yeah.. some of the sayings people throw out are just shitty. And it does get more insidious. I'm only guessing at your situation but know of people with cancer where people would say things like "I don't think they have the mental strength to survive this".
It sounds like a difficult situation to be in. Are you still in it, or have you at least found a way to avoid the frustration and confusion of their comments?