this post was submitted on 27 Jul 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] laz@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (2 children)

To: All Staff

From: HR

Subject: EXCITING new partnership!

Team, we've been reviewing some of history's most successful large-scale projects for inspiration, and the data is clear! The absolute best results came from teams who believed their CEO was literally a god.

While we can't quite arrange that, we've found the next best thing!

After a productive meeting, we've received a special clarification directly from the Vatican! Turns out, Colossians 3:23 ("Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord") is now considered binding corporate policy.

So, effective immediately, hitting your quarterly goals is a direct path to salvation. Slacking off... well, let's just say the paperwork for eternal damnation is a real hassle for everyone involved.

Let's get to work, saints!

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 7 points 5 days ago

Is this like a Return To Office thing, or can I continue to build the pyramid from home?

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I realize this is a joke, and it did elicit a good chuckle from me, but I have two technical sort of nit picks / factoids.

As I understand these things:

To the vast majority of Catholics, the Pope is not literally a god-king, who becomes basically a minor god oh his physical death, or just literally is onenof the greater gods made incarate... the Pope is God's chosen representative on Earth, sort of like a more formalized version of many Old Testament prophets, who also leads God's church.

Also... the Amish, the Mennonites... they very much do have as part of their culture, which very much revolves around religion... that you more or less are a expected to, and by this cement that you are a good person of faith and character, that you help others by participating, often regularly, in work-gangs, to stand up at least the basics of barn or house, in what is a shockingly short amount of time, and done in a very high quality manner, with less technologically advanced tools than what is normal for others.

Seriously, if you've never seen this, go look up something like Amish Barn Raising on youtube.

They start with basically just raw materials, assemble large parts of the framing, stand em up with just ropes, set up and join the whole thing, get the outer walls and roof on and doors on, in under a a single work day.