I hope there comes a time where your passion does not need slurs to be expressed in a way you feel best represents your feelings in the heat of the moment.
That's not a joke or anything. Passion can be great and cathartic. It's a shame then that it can so often be marred by internalized hatred, and I genuinely hope that changes for not just you, but all of us.
You might think so but internalized hatred doesn't just have to be aimed at others. Internalized self-hatred is real, and it doesn't have to manifest as outward, malicious vitriol projected at others.