The fact that I can't tell if this is parody or not is sad.
this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2025
456 points (96.3% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
33168 readers
3392 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Just found this, I still laugh every time
Looks legit all the way down to the goat. Screams tribal dogma
It’s high-effort satire and the original site is now derelict but it originates from this page.
Woah, they got me.
load more comments
(1 replies)
"They think they have it figured out, why are they so sad?"
Well Jimmy, when you realize religious fanatics would rather shoot homeless people then feed them, its a bit of a downer!
than*
"then" is for time, as in "afterwards".
Unless OP means they shoot the homeless and afterwards attempt to feed them
Seems on brand. Like they want people deported so they can go on missionary trips to accost them in their home countries with the love of Jesus.
load more comments
(1 replies)
They're also happier when you're not around, Jimmy.
then feed on them
And they have the gall to act like they're better than you because you're working a mininum wage job on a Sunday.
"You should be in church right now!"
"If I was, then who the fuck would be serving you at Cracker Barrel right now?"
Buncha witnesses tried approaching me the other day as I was tending to my flower bed. I sprayed them with my water hose, and yelled "where is your god now, feel the might of my athiest hose, let its water soak sin into your skin" they started crying and saying "were gonna get our parents and they will call the cops". Turns out they were "girl scouts" selling "cookies" and now I have a court date. At least I didn't get witnessed, score one for this athiest
Bro scored a date
Tbh sin water sounds much cooler than "holy water."
If you distrust someone because of their religious beliefs, you're probably a bad person.
Then again, I don't trust Christians. Hypocrisy at its finest.
If you distrust someone because of their religious beliefs, you're probably a bad person.
Wait.. why? Why is it bad to distrust someone who believes in an invisible friend who grants wishes well into their 30s?
Its worth noting that most of these people were indoctrinated into their beliefs since they were born, and many of them attend church weekly to reaffirm their beliefs. They were raised surrounded by christians, were told christianity is true, and think that if you question god you will be consciously tortured for eternity. They're not just a bunch of idiots.
load more comments
(1 replies)
You can trust someone without expecting pure rationality from them
That’s why a friend of mine is a 37 y/o virgin. 3 more years and he can cut out the middle man.
load more comments
(7 replies)
If someone is claiming God is on their side, then absolutely they should not be trusted.
A good example was Huckabee's message to Trump where he says he shouldn't listen to humble old Huckabee, but he should listen to God, who, coincidentally, is saying exactly the same thing as Huckabee.
If you have your faith but make no assertions about it's validity over other opinions nor that it confers divine authority to the words or deeds of any person, cool, I respect that faith. I'm inclined to have some faith myself, but I'm not about to claim any of it is more than my personal wild guesses and hope.
However organized religion is generally exploitable and bad people take advantage...
What kind of unchristian monster would want to stay home and rest on a Sunday instead of going to the enormous effort of getting the family into all your best clothes, going to the church and pretending to be socially acceptable and normal for a few hours and then cooking a massive meal like god intended?
"Day of rest" my ass, that sounds like a lot of work!
load more comments
(5 replies)
Every time I tell a religious person I’m an atheist they either freeze up completely, which put a damper on the conversation, or they get very angry and tell me I’m disgraceful. My experience with religious people is that they are very uncool.
To be fair, they've been conditioned that atheists are basically guys driving around in unmarked vans offering kids candy because atheism is SUPER bad for their business.
You mean, I don't have to get up on Sunday, I don't have to be pressured to give 30% of my salary to the church, and I don't have to deal with a bunch of racist, immoral pricks dotted around the congregation because they're there for 'forgiveness' and I should be 'accepting' of that?
we used to do that, but have you seen the cost of candy nowadays? who can afford to go around giving candy to children?
Dude, I'm in a large neighborhood, we gave away 60 lbs last year, I had to take out a second mortgage.
Straw goat attack. He's not angry, he's just tired of religious people trying to convert him.
Not to mention how many of his ancestors were sacrificed by so many different religions and demonified the image of goats.
different religions and demonifie
To their credit, he and his ancestors are delicious with a little curry.
I had a 'pastor' try and witness to me yesterday, insisting that his spiritual experiences made him right, while the spiritual experiences of people that converted to Judaism or Islam meant they had been deceived by the devil.
It's always funny how their experience could never have been caused by devil trickery, only the others'. Same as the divine revelation of the word, only theirs is truly divine and correct, unlike those filthy others
What does the verb "to witness for" mean?
To try to convert someone.
What is the deal with religious people and conversion therapy?
For most of them, it’s because they truly, deeply believe that if they don’t convert you, you’re going to burn in hell for eternity when you die.
For most of the leaders of those sorts of churches, it’s because more people means more money for that new private jet they’re saving up for.
...if they don’t convert you, you’re going to burn in hell for eternity when you die.
Some like it hot. Leave me alone.
conversion therapy is not at all the same thing. conversion therapy is usually phycological abuse of already participating religious people who are trying to "convert" their sexual orientation to "normal".
to convert someone is to try and get them to join your church.
they're very different things.
They're not completely unrelated.
I'm not even a atheist really and preachers were telling my co workers to not witness for me. My statements were hard to dismiss and their bullshit has too many holes in it. I made one of my co workers fellow god bothers get up and leave when I told them why their devil would never tempt me. It wasn't even my concept. I read a very short story one time about the devil being reluctant to offer deals anymore. It was afraid someone would ask for something that would destroy it. Of course the next guy asked for it. What he asked for went something like this.
"Without any change in myself whatsoever I wish to be the most evil soul to have or will exists."
That is when they told my coworker terry to never bring up jesus with me again. It was a great day for me and I told him It was a victory for me.
Edit: Here it is "Little man wishes "that without any change whatsoever in myself, I become the most evil, stupid and miserable person on earth. Satan screams."
The story is "Millennium" by Fredric Brown
I was talking to a guy a guy with a Mr.Gruff tattoo and was just staring at it and must have had an odd expression because he pointed at it and says, "This one? You recognize it from that tract meme, he's Mr Gruff."
This dude is from a obscure Disney Channel show that apparently ran for 39 episodes.
load more comments
(4 replies)
I'm sure this comment section will be civil and not at all toxic in any way.
My parents made me go to Church growing up it's probably the reason I'm a delinquent, it's so fucking boring and I felt like my soul was being sucked out of energy
view more: next ›