What in the orphan crushing machine is this shit?!
https://maritime-executive.com/article/bananas-ahoy-as-overboard-containers-wash-ashore
this post was submitted on 12 Dec 2025
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Oh goodie, the insurers are fully engaged! I'm sure they will help clear the quickly rotting food off the beach just as much as the volunteers who are physically there doing actual work.
God I hate pencil-pusher culture, it's so weird π
Thanks for the quote! I realise I replied snarkily - I'm not mad at you of course, just at the quote
I am now imagining an insurance office where suddenly an alarm goes off:
The lights turn red, a siren howls, and everyone jumps up from their seats and runs to a garage where black vans are wating with the engines running.
They drive to the beach and frantically start picking up bananas, in a race against time and decomposition.
I was thinking some sort of boardroom with a big screen on one wall, showing a beach covered in bananas, with some bald fella, who is unmistakably French, looking on, then waving his hand and saying βEngage.β
But alas instead it's a board of lawyers that are engaged in a race to find a loophole to get out of this without spending anything cleaning.
In my area there are independent contractors who listen in on their police scanners. When there is a fire or a break in these contractors show up in a van filled with plywood. As soon as the authorities allow them in they seal the building so no one can get inside. When the insurance company rep shows up they are happy to pay off the contractor because sealing the place prevents further damage.
I bet that van often happens to be parked right around the corner when a building catches fire.
Because it's New York, yes that did happen at least once.