this post was submitted on 12 Nov 2025
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People typically give these sorts of responses when either (a) they are tired or (b) they can sense that you aren't actually interested in them.
You should understand that a and b are interrelated, as almost no one is ever too tired to express how they are feeling to someone they trust.
The trick here is not to keep asking questions, but to empathize:
“How’s work treating you?”
It’s work.
^ this "neutral" response is actually a polite negative.
"Yeah, tell me about it - my job's boring as shit. At least it's almost lunch time..."
Note that this doesn't always work, and the person may just keep giving "blah" responses. That's fine. You tried to connect. You tried to be interested. Accept their non-interest and try again with the next person. You will get better at being interested and empathizing with practice, and your increased care for others will become more apparent to others, generating better responses.