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Whoever you were unfaithful with probably hadn't promised your boyfriend anything, so definitely it's irrational to blame "the other guy".
If you had agreed to be in a monogamous relationship, you broke that agreement, and for most people that's a very serious thing.
I do not however buy into your claim that this issue is something men care about more than woman. On the contrary women are generally the ones complaining about potentially unfaithful men, and I've heard many women generalize that men are often unfaithful, to a degree one would think that is much more common. But statistics clearly indicate that since there are more men than women, chances are that on average, women are more frequently unfaithful than men.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pigeonhole_principle