this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2025
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The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

  • Be kind

  • Ask people what they think, and why

  • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility (EDIT: no, this is not specifically referring to Nazis. I get it, they're the first thing that comes to mind. I'm not telling you to approve of Nazis I'm just saying be kind to your fellow lemmites)

  • Engage sincerely

  • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

  • Make this small space worth being in

A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

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[–] Vanilla_PuddinFudge@infosec.pub 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

A lot of people dive in as if the entire fediverse has the same level of nerve as 4chan.

There are a lot of sensitive people here. The best thing I learned through my dealings with Mastodon is to be kind, and lurk before hitting that comment button.

The level of discord on the fediverse waxes and wanes depending where you are. There are conversations I'd never have here, that I'd gladly have elsewhere with no ill effects. The right words for the right group of people.

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[–] Fungah@lemmy.world 14 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

The thing in this post about curiosity isn't just a lemmy/online thing.

The vast majority of people are mainly interested in themselves. Like - if you have trouble on dates, making friends, getting along at work, anything to do with people in general - approaching them with a sense of sincere curiosity will completely change things overnight.

Get people to talk about themselves, be supportive in your discussions with them, and shut the fuck up wherever possible and suddenly you're interesting, a good person, kind, whatever - traits you've done exactly fuck all to demonstrate, but that people will swear are true because you seem interested in them.

It's fucking bonkers but it's true. Curiosity can change your world.

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[–] rayyy@lemmy.world 14 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I don't miss the thousands of obnoxious, foul mouthed folks on FB that I routinely blocked. Haven't experienced any of that on the fediverse yet.

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[–] Blaze@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Great post, as usual. Thank you for this!

[–] Cris_Color@lemmy.world 10 points 3 weeks ago

Thank you! ❤️

[–] FluorideMind@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I notice tons and tons of hostility in comments. And I think it's from people jumping to the worst possible conclusion.

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[–] Alphane_Moon@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago

Upvote, comment, post! Compliment good OC content (especially if it is posted regularly).

Bring more regular users if you can.

[–] HulkSmashBurgers@reddthat.com 13 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Also try to post stuff. I need to follow my own advice more.

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[–] mesamunefire@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I hope you have a good weekend!

[–] Cris_Color@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

Thank you my friend, you too!

[–] FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I love this.

I think it’s important to say this doesn’t mean pretending you like or agree with something you don’t like or agree with.

But when you do see something you like, agree with, or appreciate, drop a compliment. Compliments make places better!

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[–] Alborlin@lemmy.world 11 points 3 weeks ago

Okay I agree, so let's start from Linux related any post, tell them if somebody asks a problem don't tell them just install mint , or how one is crazy because they are facing the problems in Linux or if you are not using Linux what idiot are you. I stopped participating because

  1. Linux dude bros are just idiots troubling me
  2. I can't find content which is though not niche is just is plain not news or Linux
  3. It's very confusing to use fedverse as I don't know of i can go all subs via my boost app or do i need something else , if so where to access them.

So let's make it ACCESSIBLE, NON DERAGORTY FOR ANON LINUX USERS ALSO

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I have also noticed people agreeing with someone in a reply to another comment, but the original commenter has no upvotes. If you agree, upvote. If you kind of agree, upvote. If you don't agree, but they make a good case, upvote and then say that. Upvotes make people feel good.

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[–] microdickie@lemmy.world 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

When I see small, I see potential. More people know each other which fosters genuine relationships and understanding, ingredients missing from the toxic environments of the big social networks.

My ex used to call me a very small dude with a big city attitude. She didn't mean it as a compliment, but I took it as one.

The fediverse is just a beautiful place to be you. It feels calm, relaxed, intellectual and full of supportive people. It's a refreshiong alternative to the sprawling and sometimes impersonal nature of vast social networks.

One thing we should all agree on, we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

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[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 10 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

Lemmy has a well-known reputation as being a "Nazi bar". e.g. as mentioned in this example post in r/RedditAlternatives complaining about toxicity on Lemmy, here is one of the comments therein (not from OP but as part of the overall conversation):

If their experience is anything like mine, it’s populated by mostly far left wing Americans who were banned from Reddit for being too extreme. I disagreed with someone about a topical left wing American position and received death threats. In fact I’ve never received that many death threats on Reddit. Lemmy is extreme.

Even if the threats came from Hexbear or one of the lemmy.ml mods who are allowed to make death threats against users without any repercussions, "we" still expose "our" users to such content when we federate with those communities. i.e., for exactly the same reason that we defederate from instances that share CSAM, if we really, truly, genuinely don't like it when mods make death threats against users, then we need to put a stop to it - by defederating those instances that are known to do exactly that.

Otherwise we give our tacit approval, and moreover whenever we encourage people to join Lemmy instances, we willingly expose those people to this kind of content. Would you expose someone to CSAM, knowingly and without warning them first? Then why is it different when we can see the death threats, delivered by mods, who are not censured in any way, yet still encourage people to come here to Lemmy communities? Are we truly that desperate for content that we are so inconsiderate to them as to expose them to that without warning?

If you somehow have not heard of this yet and really don't know what I'm talking about, a lot of details are offered in Discuss.Online's (successful) Petition to defederate from hexbear.net, although that particular mod in question is from Lemmy.ml.

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[–] Condiment2085@lemm.ee 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
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