this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[โ€“] Ledivin@lemmy.world 142 points 1 day ago (1 children)

and then everyone else in the cafeteria clapped ๐Ÿ™„

[โ€“] Lexam@lemmy.world 30 points 1 day ago

No, but I did go to the principals office and they went to the nurse. That was over thirty years ago though.

[โ€“] diemartin@sh.itjust.works 91 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (7 children)

Who the fuck drinks coffee while eating pasta

People who are trying to make the most of a lunch break

[โ€“] bestagon@lemmy.world 26 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Iโ€™d probably guess the Italians

[โ€“] Mok98@feddit.it 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)

And you would be wrong, in Italy coffee is almost never drunk while eating something salty. Actually is mostly drunk alone as its own dish, aside from breakfast

[โ€“] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 22 points 1 day ago (2 children)

And if you break this rule, THEY KILL YOU ON THE SPOT

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[โ€“] robocall@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[โ€“] javiwhite@feddit.uk 14 points 1 day ago (2 children)

*they drink espresso based coffees.

The italians invented lattes, cappuccinos, Americanos etc... most espresso based coffee finds its origin in Italy; it's just instant coffee and whatever it is Starbucks are doing that they tend to scoff at.

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[โ€“] Etterra@discuss.online 22 points 1 day ago (2 children)

My dad. He drinks coffee with everything, including his coffee.

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[โ€“] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 day ago (10 children)

An adhd-haver whoโ€™s on their third cup of the day at lunch, and will have 3 more over the course of the afternoon.

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[โ€“] WereCat@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Why not? You can even use some pasta as a straw

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[โ€“] REDACTED@infosec.pub 12 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Me, 5 minutes ago. What's so special about pasta and coffee combo?

[โ€“] affiliate@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

i will drink coffee with anything. yogurt, salad, chips and salsa, tofu, the list goes on.

[โ€“] tatterdemalion@programming.dev 62 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'd actually like to see someone try to slam their fist down on a table while drinking coffee without spilling.

[โ€“] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 14 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

You've got to suck really hard to leverage surface tension while fisting.

Pro move but it can be done

[โ€“] MintyFresh@lemmy.world 8 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

This guy sips and smashes!

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[โ€“] Lexam@lemmy.world 48 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I have stabbed people with a fork for trying to touch my food.

[โ€“] 474D@lemmy.world 65 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I have stabbed no one because I'm not insane. Different strokes I guess

[โ€“] StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 day ago (3 children)
[โ€“] Mac@mander.xyz 8 points 1 day ago

In the membranity

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[โ€“] Lexam@lemmy.world 17 points 1 day ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

No it was not insanity, it was undiagnosed Autism in a poor rural community. This is why proper social support matters.

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[โ€“] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago

If it's on or near my plate I'm gonna try and eat it. It's called finger food for a reason.

[โ€“] Tonava@sopuli.xyz 10 points 1 day ago (9 children)

Just quickly lean towards their hand and snap your teeth like you're going to bite. Works with all sorts of unwanted touching, just be ready to actually bite if they're also nuts and try again to call your bluff. Even if they get angry they're much less likely to want to throw hands with the high possibility of getting bit hanging in the air.

The downside is you will look even more insane than with just fork stabs, but on the plus side you will look insane enough people will stay the fuck away in the future too

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[โ€“] twice_hatch@midwest.social 39 points 1 day ago (1 children)

a brief coworker

COWER BRIEF MORTALS

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[โ€“] Part4@infosec.pub 32 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Where was this work? The prison kitchen or something?

[โ€“] burgerchurgarr@lemmus.org 32 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[โ€“] PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 42 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Honestly? Those break room hostilities can get intense. I learned at a young age to not fuck with a salaried man's luncheon. I believe it.

[โ€“] Honytawk@feddit.nl 18 points 1 day ago

Don't fuck with anyones food. Even animals get hostile.

[โ€“] Fuctangle@sh.itjust.works 30 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago) (1 children)
[โ€“] TherapyGary@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 14 hours ago (4 children)
[โ€“] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 7 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Yes it's taken from 4chan. Not an AI image.

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[โ€“] Kurious84@eviltoast.org 22 points 20 hours ago (4 children)
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[โ€“] Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world 20 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

Rolled a nat 20 on intimidation.

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