this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2025
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Today I Learned

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[–] not_woody_shaw@lemmy.world 16 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

Headmaster: Well... Well... Well, it's all got to do with the library, you see. We've had a lot of trouble recently with boys taking out library books without library cards. Your son was caught, and I administered a beating, during which he died. But you'll be glad to know... You'll be glad to know that the ringleader was caught, so I don't think we'll be having any trouble with library discipline. You see, the library card system...

Mr Perkins: I'm sorry...

Headmaster: ...was...

Mr Perkins: You beat my son to death?

Headmaster: Yes, yes, so it would seem. Please, I'm not used to being interrupted. You see, the library card system was introduced...

Mr Perkins: Well, exactly what happened?

Headmaster: Well, apparently, boys were just slipping into the library and taking the books!

Mr Perkins: No, during the beating!

[–] malfisya@piefed.social 5 points 18 hours ago

Classic sketch from Rowan Atkinson!

[–] Nusm@piefed.zip 4 points 16 hours ago

Mr Perkins: This is preposterous!

Headmaster: Yes, it is. Or at least, it would be...if it were true.

Mr Perkins: ...What?

Headmaster: I've been joking, Mr Perkins. Pardon me, it's my strange academic sense of humour. I've been pulling your leg.

Mr Perkins: Oh, thank God!

Headmaster: I wouldn't cancel afternoon school to bury that little shit!

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 10 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

This website purposefully breaks itself when it detects ad blocking, so I won't be reading the article

[–] jjmoldy@lemmy.world 2 points 18 hours ago

It works fine for me

[–] Bebopalouie@lemmy.ca 6 points 18 hours ago

I got off easy. My grade 2 teacher smacked my hand with a ruler because I had the “devil” in me. I was left handed. All hell broke loose when my mom found out.

[–] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 3 points 19 hours ago
[–] 2xspicy@sopuli.xyz 3 points 19 hours ago

Board member N.B. Hanson claimed to a reporter that Opsahl had just “made a mistake though an attempt to scare the boys.” Not only that, but the outrage over it might have been misguided. “There is no cause for such excitement as prevailed yesterday over [his] mistake. It was a prank, apparently with no criminal intent,” Hanson said. The teacher, he added, was “a young man, full of life, and has a very good record … the situation is not such as to cause so much furor.” Hanson’s own son had even tried out the chair and experienced no ill effects, he claimed.

Hahaha, it’s just a prank, bro…

[–] fubbernuckin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago) (1 children)

Clearly overblown. This isn't like a lethal or dangerous shock he used, some of the students in the class went on it for fun. The article says it's just enough to cause a tingling sensation. This whole thing was sent to the media by one parent throwing a tantrum.

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 2 points 18 hours ago

These things are probably more dangerous.

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