Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works

There's a spider in my bathroom (cdn.imgchest.com)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Samdell@lemmy.eco.br to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

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[–] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

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[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 weeks ago

I know I have hidden spider bros because I haven't seen a single insect in my apartment in several years.

It's just the fact that I haven't seen any spiders in a while that makes me worried that I'm gonna lift something off the floor and see thousands of them or some shit lol

[–] markovs_gun@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

This is one instance where I'd say I'd actually prefer if he had an anime body pillow or real doll he was forming this sort of unhealthy attachment to.

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

What a freak!

Just fall in-love with AI like a normal person.

(I can't even do that, I literally can't see AI as people)

[–] Outwit1294@lemmy.today 2 points 3 days ago

Maybe you are just AI phobic bigot!

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 weeks ago

I feel so much more normal for just saying hello to my shower spider now.

[–] qyron@sopuli.xyz 1 points 2 weeks ago

Loneliness affects people. And as gregariois animals we are, the closest possibility to connect, in any form, is taken.

[–] Tracaine@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

He's going to let a spider crawl on his penis in the name of gooning isn't he? I really want off this ride.

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

It happened long ago. Closer to you than you think

[–] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Bro, if it bites him he will get a spider dick that shoots webs.

[–] Outwit1294@lemmy.today 1 points 3 days ago

My dick already shoots white sticky thing

[–] bathing_in_bismuth@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 weeks ago

Spider-bros are the best. I hope one day I can have a trained jumping spider sidekick on my shoulder.