this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2025
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Agressive takeover. You come to a farm with a suitcase full of cash and threaten the farmer's kids and wife. You force him to take the money and when you leave, make sure to point a finger at him and say "I'll be back next year to buy another share. I own you now!"
"Those are some nice vegetables you got there. Truly would be a shame if someone snuck onto your field every night and took a perfect cartoon bite out of every single one..."
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You are describing the eating habits of groundhogs. They destroy just to destroy. Other animals take a few butes on one plant at a time. But those giant rats just chop shit down and repeat. I leave wildlife alone in general, but the first time these assholes manage to bypass the garden defenses they are taken out.