this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2025
362 points (97.6% liked)

News

33052 readers
4027 users here now

Welcome to the News community!

Rules:

1. Be civil


Attack the argument, not the person. No racism/sexism/bigotry. Good faith argumentation only. This includes accusing another user of being a bot or paid actor. Trolling is uncivil and is grounds for removal and/or a community ban. Do not respond to rule-breaking content; report it and move on.


2. All posts should contain a source (url) that is as reliable and unbiased as possible and must only contain one link.


Obvious right or left wing sources will be removed at the mods discretion. Supporting links can be added in comments or posted seperately but not to the post body.


3. No bots, spam or self-promotion.


Only approved bots, which follow the guidelines for bots set by the instance, are allowed.


4. Post titles should be the same as the article used as source.


Posts which titles don’t match the source won’t be removed, but the autoMod will notify you, and if your title misrepresents the original article, the post will be deleted. If the site changed their headline, the bot might still contact you, just ignore it, we won’t delete your post.


5. Only recent news is allowed.


Posts must be news from the most recent 30 days.


6. All posts must be news articles.


No opinion pieces, Listicles, editorials or celebrity gossip is allowed. All posts will be judged on a case-by-case basis.


7. No duplicate posts.


If a source you used was already posted by someone else, the autoMod will leave a message. Please remove your post if the autoMod is correct. If the post that matches your post is very old, we refer you to rule 5.


8. Misinformation is prohibited.


Misinformation / propaganda is strictly prohibited. Any comment or post containing or linking to misinformation will be removed. If you feel that your post has been removed in error, credible sources must be provided.


9. No link shorteners.


The auto mod will contact you if a link shortener is detected, please delete your post if they are right.


10. Don't copy entire article in your post body


For copyright reasons, you are not allowed to copy an entire article into your post body. This is an instance wide rule, that is strictly enforced in this community.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] W3dd1e@lemmy.zip 65 points 20 hours ago (9 children)

Headline is a bit misleading. He has 10 years to meet a list of requirements to get the pay package.

I actually don’t think he can do it.

He has to sell 1mil humanoid robots, get 12mil robo taxies in the street, and get Tesla’s market cap to $8trillion.

I don’t think he can do the last one. They are at 1 trillion now. NVIDIA has the highest market cap at like 4 trillion.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 16 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

He missed every milestone at SpaceX. Stock investors are fucking delusional about autonomous taxis, Waymo has been there for years and it's not a trillion dollar business.

Humanoid robots is pure wank, unless Tesla pivots to sex dolls.

[–] Weirdfish@lemmy.world 1 points 36 minutes ago

I would not fuck a Tesla.

[–] Honytawk@feddit.nl 12 points 17 hours ago (4 children)

He won't be able to do the other things either.

The most difficult part of designing humanoid robots is the AI. Boston Dynamics has been working on it since 1993. You can't just slap an LLM on it and hope it works. They will also need rigorous safety testing before a new product like this is even allowed to be sold. Not going to happen in 10 years. 20-30 years at least.

Tesla also is incredibly far behind with their self driving cars. Even if they finally get permission to sell robot taxis, the market will already be saturated by other manufacturers. They will be lucky to sell that many.

It will just all go on his list of unaccomplished lies:

https://elonmusk.today/

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 11 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

They will also need rigorous safety testing before a new product like this is even allowed to be sold.

Sweet summer child ...

[–] Zron@lemmy.world 2 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

The United States might let them on the roads, but the rest of market won’t.

12 million vehicles basically guarantees they have to sell overseas, and for Tesla that pretty much means Europe and Australia, which both have more strict vehicle safety standards than the US.

It’s not gonna happen.

[–] Zexks@lemmy.world 1 points 13 hours ago
[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 3 points 14 hours ago

Musk does not need rigorous safety testing for his shit cars, why would he need them for murderous robots?

[–] KaChilde@sh.itjust.works 3 points 17 hours ago

They will also need rigorous safety testing before a new product like this is even allowed to be sold.

Welcome to the world according to Musk. These things will be out in the wild, mangling people and spontaneously combusting before a safety inspector can get within a mile of Tesla.

[–] TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 1 points 16 hours ago (2 children)

It's not even AI that's the problem wrt to making humanoid robots, it's the lack of dexterity of automatons to do even the most basic tasks that most human can do. Even if AI improves, robots that can move like humans is still the hurdle.

[–] Honytawk@feddit.nl 1 points 13 hours ago

Definitely, the small and powerful motors it requires don't exist yet. Every robot until then will move more slowly and fluently than a human

But they don't need them to in order to sell them. They do need the AI to be smart enough not to kill the humans it works with.

[–] 4grams@awful.systems 11 points 14 hours ago

Of course he can’t. He knows that. This was 100% optics, so he can go down in history as the worlds first trillionaire. It doesn’t matter that it won’t happen, it did on paper, and that’s all these types care about. He can now brag and boast on his newfound success, and insanely, it will work (at least for a while).

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 5 points 11 hours ago

He doesn't need to do it, he'll just lie about it as he always lies about literally everything.

Without his lying he would be a nobody as he has no discernable skill beyond lying his ass off and selling people fantasies

1 million Tesla robots? I've seen student projects that are more impressive than that shit theyve presented and half of it was faked because they couldn't event et anything basic done. Compare those Tesla robots to Boston dynamics and you'd die from laughter

12 million robo taxis? Tesla still doesn't have full self driving that can get a Tesla off a parking lot yet he claims they can cruise cross country through the US without help. Uh huh...

And who forgot how we set foot on Mars in 2018? What a wonderful time that was.

[–] myfunnyaccountname@lemmy.zip 5 points 14 hours ago

This stock and company is so propped up on bullshit, it will happen. Even if the board and investors have to buy his bullshit so he can meet these goals. They need it to happen so the stock price keeps going up.

[–] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 5 points 13 hours ago

What if he gets the government to buy it all, in a roundabout way to provide services to the populace via the government. The rejig the taxis to mean robo trains and buses that are free for everyone. The robots can staff hospitals, doing menial tasks (cleaning, changing diapers), leaving the more important work for actual humans.

Maybe he was a socialist all along!

[–] ChonkyLincoln@lemmy.zip 4 points 14 hours ago

Thank fucking god you explained this. I was thinking wtf is wrong with this world and now I understand this is an unreasonable performance comp plan - makes so much more sense and with the damage he’s done to that brand, people like me wouldn’t buy a thing from them. I wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 2 points 13 hours ago

No way he lasts 10 years.

Tesla will be bankrupt in 2 years. They may flog it to keep it moving for a while longer, but it is already too late. It's brand reputation sucks, nobody is buying them but losers, most people that own one would dump it if anyone would pay a reasonable amount for it, the quality control is notoriously terrible, and as they age, their repair and maintenance issues are going to become very expensive. They won't recover from any of that. If it wasn't for the government buying so much unused inventory, they'd be in even worse shape than they are.

Besides, he is one of the most reviled men on the planet. In 10 years, the world is going to be very different. Either it will be ruled by ruthless scum like Musk and Trump, or the other 8 billion people on the planet will do something about the >50 people in the world who are fucking it up for everybody else.

I'm really hoping that a decade from now, Musk, and his psychopathic super villain buddies, won't be an issue, one way or another.

[–] SabinStargem@lemmy.today 2 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

It depends on how these things are defined. Say, for example, a 1-foot humanoid roomba minus any utility. When it comes to the market cap, causing hyperinflation of America's dollar can allow it to become true by the word, if inflation isn't part of the agreement.

The robo-taxi is probably the toughest part. Maybe a means for the military to 'taxi' explosives into civilians at Stephan Miller's command?

I know. This all sounds stupid. Unfortunately, I have precedent. Gestures at the year 2025.