this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2025
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I wish I felt the same way, but other users are making it frustrating and draining. I'm contemplating leaving. But, I don't know of anything similar to browse, other than Reddit and I refuse to use their app or pay a subscription for another.
Don't let a few people ruin your experience
It's more than a few. It's several admins, a handful of their followers, nearly an entire instance's users (even after blocking it), prolific posters that mod dozens of comms and people will rally behind them regardless of how much of an asshole they are being to you, and even one user in particular that was banned but is now hiding under a new account.
It's also partly how the platform works which feeds the most toxic users. It's how the platform seems to entice people into stricter tribalistic behavior than other platforms. Say anything that might be construed as negative towards one of the many things these groups base their entire identity on and you get swarmed by them and you can't even defend yourself. You get downvoted to hell and they get upvoted for being assholes by their other cult-like followers. Not that votes "matter", but it just makes it feel shitty when someone decides to be an asshole to you and they get supported for it while trying to defend yourself only gets more people against you.
There's more, but trying to describe it all is making me feel worse.
This place sucks. It's absolutely awful that I feel this is actually true, but reddit was better than this.
I find it useful to sign up for multiple accounts and then segregate those into browsing/posting habits for different categories. One for gaming (or other relaxed communities), one for science & tech, one for politics that I only occasionally dip into, one that's a voting only account, etc.
At the very least, you can take a break from communities that can easily be more toxic, whenever you want. If downvotes bother you, I would also suggest signing up with a fediverse instance that disables downvotes.
It's not perfect, but we don't have anywhere better to go.
I don't expect perfection from anywhere. But yeah, nowhere better to go is kinda the main issue. I feel trapped and surrounded.
I have an account with non drama communities (!gardening@lemmy.world and others), then one that has the meta communities (and the drama)
Sometimes I only use the first one, allows me to take a break from the meta drama
The world is what you make of it. It's definitely not fair. One tip: narrow your experiences until you can stand them?
Honestly PieFed helps so much with that, it's like night and day. Maybe switch to PieFed.World (or something) and check how those categories of communities change your experience completely. You don't even need to make an account to start with that.
You don't ever have to scroll your main feed again, until and unless you want to... there are whole entire days when I have not done so, and a wealth of content to be seen if only the right tool helps connect you to what you are looking for. Drop the largest communities and embrace the niche, if you are looking for quality over quantity. Blaze managed it on Lemmy but it took having twenty different accounts, whereas PieFed lets you do it with just one.
What instance?
dbzer0, actually. I literally just had a recent encounter with the admin Flatworm/Unruffled where they decided to needlessly pick a fight. They were backed up by other dbzer0 users, including @Blaze@lemmy.dbzer0.com, in fact.
For context
The whole thing is quite large for a temporary 7 days ban, but the reported person is a prolific poster, so a lot of people had comments to make.
On the other hand the voting / flair system implemented on dbzer0 is quite unique, in a positive way https://lemmy.dbzer0.com/post/49093780
The real context is that I was merely disagreeing with db0 being chill based on my own experience. Flatworm/Unruffled and Eugene then busted in being rude as hell for just disagreeing. You supported that behavior.
The first link refers to that exchange indeed. Everyone can interpret that conversation on their own.
What other interpretation could there even be?
My comment made no claims regarding the user from the main post or actions against them, it was only in regard to the claim about db0. That's why I explained that the only context has to do with that first comment thread.
I was not rude at all, just that I disagreed. Why does that mean it's okay for those two to jump in to rudely make false claims?
Other interpretation: you and db0 admins have had disagreements in the past:
Those disagreements are what alter your perception of the instance, which is why they mention them.
Edit: I don't care about pro or anti-AI, but this seems to be the new division point around here
The interpretation of those two jumping in to be rude as hell is not exclusive from acknowledging disagreements in the past. Particularly in that is already implied with my original comment there as I referenced my experience.
There was absolutely no reason for those two to act that way there, even if their intention was to attempt to point out that they think I was in the wrong in the previous encounters. "I think you were the one in the wrong at those times you're referring to." Or something along those lines accomplishes the same goal without being an asshole or making clearly false claims.
Ironically, their choice to be such assholes in that circumstance adds quite a bit of evidence that the dbzer0 people were the ones in the wrong.
-- Edit --
Actually, your links provide proof of the lies as well. That was when I blocked the dbzer0 instance, as I mentioned in those threads, and that was 3 months ago. So, how could I have been "constantly trolling in [dbzer0's] comms" as Flatworm/Unruffled claimed? That's exactly the kind of shit that I'm talking about. These admins, as well as some mods and users, are willing to straight up lie. And since they are admins, users have a tendency to just believe them and not even bother looking into things themselves.
I thought the division point was zero? lol.
Should it be
lemmy.dba1.comnow?Can relate. Improved my experience greatly by not browsing „all“ anymore. Just subscribed to everything I deemed worthy or interesting and stayed in my home feed. Sometimes I go into All to find some new stuff, but that’s a rare occasion.
Btw I use Voyager so I can see total upvote/downvote counts on users. Helps me weed out a lot of people that seem to be assholes on a regular basis. Yours is at 2 upvotes, so we seem to resonate somewhat ❤️
What are you finding frustrating?
Explained in another comment but trying to even explain is just making me want to delete everything.
Have you tried Beehaw? its defederated from all edgy instances and enforces strict behavior rules. From my experiences its more pleasant than any place on the internet ive seen. But its completely fair if you feel this place is frustrating and stressful to leave.
I'd recommend making an alt on another server, and curating your feed there more, and block users who are annoying.