this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2025
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[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 6 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago) (1 children)

A question that I frequently ask when presented this is "what would you personally be willing to give up?" Of course it is important to realize that some of it is systemic and not within the average person's control (e.g. car-centric infrastructure)

[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 6 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Right. I think there are a lot of people who would be happy to give up something, but would need big societal changes first. Like, giving up driving a car, but would need cities to be designed more like Europe where it's possible to get by without a car. Or, living in a more efficient high-rise apartment building vs. a less efficient detached house, but would need building codes and standards to be better so they weren't constantly being annoyed by a noisy neighbour, or having to put up with smells from other apartments.

[–] faythofdragons@slrpnk.net 2 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

This is the answer. I have a nonstandard sleep cycle (I worked nights for a decade) and that alone keeps me out of apartments. I refuse to subject a downstairs neighbor to me being most awake at 1am, and I likewise can't sleep when my neighbors are awake.

[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 2 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, I have a different sleep schedule too. But, it doesn't mean that I can't live in apartment. It just means I can't live in a poorly built apartment with bad sound isolation between floors.

I've been in high quality apartments where you could never hear the neighbours at all. The problem is, there's no requirement to build them like that, and it's much cheaper not to, so they don't tend to do it. If I could be guaranteed not to be disturbed, I'd probably prefer a high-rise. But, I've had too many bad experiences with loud neighbours, or with air leakage so I could smell it when my neighbours were smoking.

[–] faythofdragons@slrpnk.net 2 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Technically, I could live in an apartment. But I can't afford a nice one, so I can't live in an apartment, haha.

[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 2 points 7 hours ago

That's definitely part of it. But, also because it's not part of the building code, they can just lie. So, even if you go look at a luxury apartment building, they might tell you that it's high quality and you can't hear the neighbours at all. Maybe if you get a chance to talk to someone who lives there they can tell you the truth. But, in my experience a lot of real estate agents / rental agents / landlords and the like lie.