This timeline is so fucking stupid I have difficulty believing it sometimes
this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2025
392 points (97.8% liked)
Not The Onion
17614 readers
1733 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
If we do live in a simulation, can I be taken out by a corrupt memory allocation, please?
Earth.exe is causing excessive crashes, please save your work and restart.
I'd like to load a backup save please
Sorry, this is a hardcore run. No save scumming.
New game+, dlc is extra
Hmm, well when is the last time you tested those backups to ensure they aren't corrupt?
Best we can do is unplug it.
Then plug it back in again.
Sometimes I like to imagine that we are in a reincarnation simulation and by the laws of quantum mechanics even if I was reborn exactly the same to relive this life again or even if the universe was started over, it would be completely different even if all variables where exactly the same. It gives me a strange hope.
I knew it was somehow windows fault. We should obviously be running Debian.
COSMIC BIT FLIP 2028!
well someone crapped my pants i would like a reinstall please
It's just them feeding the constant news cycle with bullshit and nonsense. I say JUST but...idk I'm getting to the point where the psy-op has worked and I don't want to pay attention to the news anymore. I might make myself a old RSS style feed for like Reuters or something but getting my news from social media has been nothing but devastating. It's gotta be somewhat intentional. Not that it's not happening, but that it's always some new stupid thing that is just the right amount of outrageous that it diluted the important stuff. I don't care about some kid called big balls. That's just a symptom. The keys they jingle to keep it so the doctor with the needle is half-forgotten. Maybe they won but at least I'll be happier.
I kinda get why the guy at the end of 1984 didn't give a shit anymore by the end.
Fascists were killed to fucking death 80 years ago. And I'll remind us all, the men who fought were around 20 then. The youngest would be 100 now.
The Smoot-Hawley Act was 95 years ago, exacerbated the Great Depression. Not to mention the stock market greed and lack of government controls that started it. Today no one remembers what that kind of poverty was like in America.
Everyone who remembers is dead. This is simply history, we do this again and again. Our turn!
What a ridiculous country you have going on over there
Thanks, we all love it and want this to be happening.
Well if you don't drop everything and singlehandedly bring it all to a screeching halt i won't respect you and even if you try I'll find other reasons to criticize you ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
This is the first time I've laughed at something related to our political situation in a long time. Good job on this thread guys. I appreciate it
It's pretty fucked up, that's for sure.
Release the Trump/Epstein files
placing him in the company of luminaries such as Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King Jr. and Mother Teresa
One of these persons is not like the others...
Even so, Christopher Hitchens is not rolling in his grave.
George Tenet got one for roping us into an illegal war in Iraq.
The PMoF is meaningless.
It is now
It has been for 20 years. At least.
This is not unprecedented.
Not gonna say it hasn't been a parade of celebrity and yah yah bs, but, Jose' Andre's. I'm good with that.
Why stop there? Shell out a purple heart! Hell, make it two! Make him look like one of these old officers from dictatorships!
Ughh, I mean we are just handing military rank over to Palantir employees, so why not?
General Big Balls🎖️got his ass kicked by high schoolers while betraying his country.
Imagine being the person who has to inscribe a medal of freedom to “big balls”
Calling it now; 3 middle-schoolers are gonna beat the shit out of him and steal the medal, and that's how the bill of rights will be repealed.
holy shit nobody cares. stop being caught off guard by low effort outrage sideshows. next one drops in 12 hours or so, can we grow up enough to handle it?
This country is a fucking joke.
Balls not so big if a gun is pointed in his stupid face.
Yeah. We're armed to the fucking teeth and no one is challenging these fascists.
MAGA neighbor came stomping down the street after I called him a fascist and his wife a fat fucking Nazi. Bring it.
I calmly walked inside for my Colt .45, left the door and curtains open, awaited his arrival. He had the sense to turn the fuck around or his wife would be a widow and his daughter lacking a father. Stand your ground state!
These people never get fucking challenged. Never. They're in their echo chamber thinking everyone is on the same page. Fuck with them. Put violence on the table, make it personal.
I'm a middle-aged white guy, easy for me to say, I know. And that privilege is exactly why I push back. I can fight the fight for those less privileged. And yes, I've made my peace with dying if it comes to that. That is not a new thought to me.
Ban in 3, 2, 1...
You won't get banned for exercising your legal right to self defense against Nazis. Nor for advocating other fight fascist violence using their legal rights.
You and me. Same page.
Can I kick his ass too so he can get a second medal?
Most medals won by a puddle of bruises
Anything Epstein's best buddy hands out will be noted as a total farce and those receiving them should be ridiculed relentlessly. Cue South Park.
That's exactly it. He will forever have to say, it was awarded by Donald Trump, instantly loses all meaning. People will probably think he bought or bribed it from, DT.
Of course. These people would give literal Hitler the presidential medal of freedom if he were around to give it to. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if they award him something posthumously
if someone were to shoot him will they give him a posthumous promotion? that would be cool
placing him in the company of luminaries such as Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King Jr. and Mother Teresa.
The medal's reputation has already been tarnished, then, might as well add him.
There are infinitely many loathsome people who have gotten it, so care about this I could not less.
While I typically frown on violence, it'd be a just world if after receiving said medal, BB got his ass beat on a weekly basis.