this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2025
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Well ackshuallllyyyy they're not burning it if they're just wanking 🤓
.../s
They use their private jet to fly in the best people in the business to handle the matter personality in a hands-on fashion.
I mean, if they’re wanking with maximum force, speed and twist without destroying the cylinder (or adding supports to the cylinder,) as well as adding ferrocerium or magnesium shavings to aid in the ignition process, and if the stroking motion produces enough joules of energy, hence heat, the crude oil could ignite, producing greenhouse emissions in their place of wankage. /s
Probably thinking too much into it, but a lot of Instagram influencers out there are running a barely disguised escort service for the rich. One of the things they'll ask if they feel like you might want to hire them is if you want to fly them out. So, maybe burning jet fuel? Yeah, we're stretching things real bad here but we can make it fit rationally as well as figuratively.