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I'm 33, but man, am I glad I found forums with open minded people...to be a hateful bigot in today's age...just doesn't make sense to me.
It’s partly because forums aren’t really a thing these days. People tend to spend their time on places like Instagram, twitter, YouTube, etc. All algorithmically feeding them content. And that algorithm isn’t what’s best or most liked, but what is the most engaged with. So anything “controversial”. Which, in the real world, equates to right-wing content.
Seriously, say you go on YouTube and you want to watch a video about a film. Say you liked the most recent Ghostbusters and think it’s underrated. You find a video called something like “Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire is actually better than you think”. It’s 30 minutes long, which is about the length of time you want to kill. You start watching and you’re agreeing with it. Then it gets to the 20 minute mark and suddenly the video is talking about the woman-led reboot and how bad it is in comparison. The word “woke” starts getting thrown around. Its lack of quality is blamed on women as a whole being incapable of being funny.
Suddenly you realise that the maker of the video is a misogynist and you stop watching.
But you’ve already watched 20 minutes. YouTube now thinks you like content of the kind produced by that channel. So you’ll see a lot more of that kind of thing, because it makes people angry. Either angry because they agree with the author about how wokeness is destroying everything, or angry because they think he’s a misogynist. But either way, they’re upvoting/downvoting and leaving comments.
Now, you’re not interested in that kind of material, but perhaps there’s a video that you wouldn’t have been recommended before which isn’t as extreme, but just has a couple of things you disagree with. Perhaps it’s masked with irony and edgy humour. Watch enough of this new kind of content and you might find yourself being a little more sympathetic to the parts that you would previously have disagreed with.
This is particularly true if you’re someone who doesn’t see themselves as being in a good situation. If you haven’t got a job, then it’s much more palatable to be told that it’s because of those foreigners coming here on small boats than it is that you’re not particularly employable, or there just aren’t very many jobs right now because we’re in an economic downturn, or that the entire system is rigged to take money from the poor and give it to the rich and that you’re on the wrong side of that equation. Those things are emotionally uncomfortable and complex as ideas. The thought “it’s all because of them” feels good, because anger feels good, and it’s simple. Just get rid of “them” and all will be wonderful again.
Same with women. Do you need to work on yourself? Do you need to actually make a conscious effort to examine your attitudes and the attitudes ingrained in society and think before you make an off-hand remark to a woman? Do you need to change your attitude and start thinking of women as complex people with inner lives who don’t owe you anything even if you really, really think they’re very pretty and they smell nice and are a bit gothy and have big tits and even if you’re always polite to them and hold the door open for them and once gave them half of your chocolate bar and she accepted and smiled at you? No! It’s the femoids’ fault for only wanting Chad and Tyrone! Come join US! WE understand you! We’re not going to tell you that you need to take any responsibility for anything! We’ll tell you that you ARE owed sex and that she’s a bitch for witholding it by putting you in the friendzone! It’s not YOU! It’s THEM! It’s all THEIR fault!
There’s a lot of people in bad situations. There’s a lot of people feeling neglected and lost and helpless and hopeless and emotionally disconnected. And the message that the answer is simple and it’s all the fault of [group X] and that if you could just put [group X] in their place then you’d get everything you ever wanted, is a very, very seductive one. “It’s complicated, and will require effort, and even then things may not get much better” is a much less appealing pitch.
Combine those things with engagement-pushing algorithms which favour right-wing content - alongside far-right groups actively trying to recruit people with irony and a “boil the frog” approach, and some platforms (twitter, I’m looking in your direction) actively trying to push a far-right narrative - and it’s not really a surprise that some people, men in particular, are moving to the right.
Where are forums not a thing? I'm active on several independent forums whenever I have the time. So are many, many other people, some of which I know IRL.
They're hard if not impossible to discover these days, also most people will join and stay on social platforms where everyone they know are. For example, all my friends use Discord so it'd be social suicide to leave the platform because i'm cutting off my connection to my friends.