crime is investigated and doctors treat people
memes
Community rules
1. Be civil
No trolling, bigotry or other insulting / annoying behaviour
2. No politics
This is non-politics community. For political memes please go to !politicalmemes@lemmy.world
3. No recent reposts
Check for reposts when posting a meme, you can only repost after 1 month
4. No bots
No bots without the express approval of the mods or the admins
5. No Spam/Ads/AI Slop
No advertisements or spam. This is an instance rule and the only way to live. We also consider AI slop to be spam in this community and is subject to removal.
A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment
Sister communities
- !tenforward@lemmy.world : Star Trek memes, chat and shitposts
- !lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world : Lemmy Shitposts, anything and everything goes.
- !linuxmemes@lemmy.world : Linux themed memes
- !comicstrips@lemmy.world : for those who love comic stories.
The news is complicit here too.
BBC news: "Is your local phone shop guy part of an international criminal gang network? Let's hunt him down on the street and ask him in whatever broken english he has."
Meanwhile, a guy is actually walking around with a machete at the hospital near my work because he came to finish off a guy he'd wounded earlier (I shit you not). Not even a mention. A small clipping in a local newspaper.
Your purse was stolen? We'll get two experienced yet flawed detectives on it with a full forensic science lab.
And no one is suspicious if I sit in a car outside their home for 7 hours. Eventually crawling away with a tyre squeal.
PUT. SOMETHING. IN THE FUCKING CUPS.
Beans, orbies, just make special weighted cups for sets. No actor in the history of acting has picked up an empty paper coffee cup and gestured with it as if it had something in it.
And while we’re at it.. in this the year two thousand and twenty five, how do we still not have prop ice that floats?
Someone pointed this out to me once, and now I can't unsee it. It drives me mad. Every cup, every scene... Weightless and fake.
PUT SOMETHING IN THE DAMN CUPS
So what, you're telling me you don't tilt the cup to be perpendicular for every sip?
I learned recently that paper bags on set are made out of a different fabric material that doesn't make as much noise. It looks fairly good, but now that I know this I can never not see that every bag looks wrong and doesn't move correctly.
And stop using the exact same coffee cup with a Greek blue and gold antiquity pattern for every single cop show. Is there one coffee shop in NY? Spiros Coffee?
Actually those things really are ubiquitous in NYC and environs.
What pisses me of is when major studios make an entire show about a specific profession but cant be bothered to consult anyone from said profession
Many things the characters do that professionals in real life would say they don't do because bad things happen. But with doing things professional, the plot can't happen and there is no tension.
Im not saying they should be 100% accurate and everything needs to be done professionally, im just saying professionals from the feild should at least be consulted
The movie version of being "knocked out".
Someone is knocked unconscious for long enough to be moved to a new location and probably tied up. And they wake up just fine. They're able to engage in witty banter with their captor. If they manage to break free they're able to fight effectively.
The reality? A massive concussion. Extreme disorientation. Likely to puke if they have to move much.
If you ever watch a "knockout" in boxing or MMA, the unconsciousness lasts a seconds at most, mostly not even a second. Someone's knees go wobbly then they recover, but they're still disoriented and uncoordinated. If they're out for longer than a second or two, everyone's concerned and the fighter is rushed to the hospital.
That one time i got unconscious, was when i stepped on a tennis ball, flipped over and hit the ground with the back of my head. I was out for 15 seconds, no memories of the 3 days after that and then still pucked for days without being nauseous. I was lucky that my brain didn't swell or i would have had permanent damage.
Unconscious is the emergency shutdown an inch before death, serious stuff. The trivialization in movies bothers me.
Its an excuse to not depict the killing of a bunch of bad guys. "We're the good guys" remember?
Mostly tv shows I’ve noticed this, but all the sets and homes look impeccable. Not a speck of dust, not a hint of mess. Even in shows where kids live in the home. Everyone JUST got their hair trimmed, they wear pants at home and always pop in on each other. But the lack of mess is maddening.
Also in period movies and shows, even the peasants are always wearing clean clothes
That's often true but not always, a good set dresser will make a mess if the scene and character calls for it. Typically only for "film d'auteur" though in the more commercial things it's almost always as you said.
When there's a countdown in a movie where something must be done before it's finished but the entire scene takes longer than the countdown.
Time is non-linear, we are in the 4th dimention.
Also its usually 1 digit of time left of the decimal point on the countdown timer. Usually like 3 seconds or less, sometimes they make it so dramatic that its literally last second or fraction of a second.
Like... c'mon. Make it so at like 23 second left, or 1 minute 47 second left or something random, like every bomb always get disarmed at 1 second? The fuck lol.
Forensic experts cover themselves completely, including a face mask and hood, so they don't pollute a scene. They're not there in full glam.
No, there isn't an alert for when your computer system is under an attack. It would go off constantly because every script kiddie is trying an attack 24/7. There also isn't an alert for when the firewall is penetrated because the whole point of the penetration is that you wouldn't detect it and they can quietly steal data.
Stealing gold instead? It weighs a lot. That gold bar you're casually carrying between your finger tips actually weights as much as a reasonable big dumbbell. (16 oz bottle / half liter of gold weights very roughly as much as 2.5 gallon / 10 liter of water or 20 pound / 10 kg)
And every time people are casually thrown into walls. Meanwhile people go to the hospital after a bit of a bad fall when cleaning the gutter.
The wall thing is even more stupid when the setting is Europe and the wall wouldn't give in even a tiny bit
Happy family time and joined breakfast with bacon and cereal every morning.
When two people stare at each other while talking for several minutes and one of them is driving.
I know someone who does this IRL. It's terrifying being in a car with them.
No one secures the neck strap on motorcycles or puts the key in. There is always a motorcycle with a helmet sitting on it with the key inside.
Similarly but even more nerdy is a car making one swerve on dirt, that requires switching traction control off. Top Gear did a bit on it where they were hired to record a chase scene for a movie, and insisted on the following shot;
“You have to hold the mode button for ten seconds to turn off Traction Control!”
cue ten quiet seconds of holding the button
Scientists doing everything and coming up with ideas on their own without any assistants or collaboration. They are also somehow mad genius experts on every field, like they are also physicist, biologist and engineer all in one. Most scientists in real life are specialist because it is impossible to be a generalist. There are also no such thing as home laboratories. You can't work in an uncontrolled and unregulated environment because it affects not just results of experiments, but health and safety is a major issue if things go awry.
"But how can we create a rocket powerful enough to reach the sun?!"
'Stand back, I'm an orthodontist.'
Movie scientists creates AI on their home PC.
Reality calls for billions in datacenters, gigawatts in power and a few 10,000 people.
Similarly, when a movie scientist/engineer insists a thing can't be done, until an authority figure chews them out/threatens them. Then, there's suddenly a breakthrough.
There's other ways the person in charge can help!
and a lot of tv show car scenes ate filmed on a lowbed tow truck. once you notice the height difference you can't really unsee it.
One of the many things that annoys me about the sitcom Big Bang Theory is that as pedantic as Sheldon is, not once does he ever complain to Penny about the lack of headrests in her car. You'd think he'd refuse to ride until she replaced them. Totally immersion breaking.
In The Shining, when the family is being given a tour of the hotel fairly early in the movie, they get shown the walk in fridge. There is a shot of the door to the fridge from the hallway and then a cut to a shot from the back of the fridge looking toward the door. The hinges are on opposite sides between the two shots. Immersion ruined.
This might be a simple goof, but a lot of the layout in The Shining (intentionally) doesn't make any sense. There's some great analysis of the insane architecture of the hotel.
My biggest pet peeve is how fucking rude people are getting off the phone in movies. They just hang up.
I mean I yearn for that world but am painfully aware that it doesn't exist.
The thing that completely takes me out of the movie / show whenever I see it is people who get knocked backwards by bullets / shotgun blasts. The maximum amount of momentum transferred by a bullet or pack of shotgun pellets is the same amount as the shove it gives to the shooter's hands or shoulder.
If it's in a Chinese Gun Fu, Wire Fu, Gun Wuxia type movie where everything is slightly fantastical, I can accept it as a kind of over-the-top element of that style. But, it really bothers me when it happens in something that's otherwise fairly realistic.
Texting someone? This is the first time you're doing it. No text history ever.
Doing something that requires a thing? That thing is always new and fresh and has never been used because its a fucking prop.
Just lots of unrealistic things benign things in movies I never noticed when I was younger. Now it just pisses me off for some reason.
To me it's 2 things.
Driving with their windows down against reflections when filmed from the outside, even during rain, freezing temps and snow. Or when someone tries to grab them and they get in a car, apparently putting their window down before driving away, then to be grabbed through the window.
Other thing is roughly 600 bullets in a gun magazine, plus regular cars being completely bulletproof. Even when driving in full machine gun fire from a gun with thousands of bullets in a 30 round magazine, at most a window gets popped.
600 bullets in a gun magazine
Counting shots in John Wick was fun for that reason: the count actually works out
The bulletproof cars, on the other hand, are still an issue.
The usual line you'll hear on set is that "if your audience notices this, you're doing something wrong with your story telling".
"Over and Out". No, it's either "Over" or "Out".
Close your fucking dust cover.
You salute when wearing a hat.
This is the first time I have noticed the selection of CDs on the sun visor.
My little cousin once asked me why we used to burn CD's instead of recycling them. Funny how life creeps up on you and suddenly you're old.
That's amateur film maker stuff.
In real film making, people become the head rest: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxb9xzAaYjM
Lately, I find weather maddening. It’s either a non-issue mid-season light sweater weather, extremely consistent across all movies and films ever made, unless it’s a monsoon like downpour -but everyone is immediately dry unless it’s a plot point. Rarely, it snows, a snows that never settles, never gives any problems, never freezes anyone’s hands.
WTF

