Ask Lemmy

Really trying to change anyone's mind online. I've just given up trying to debate evil, I just try to make people laugh at them now.

Of course it's a losing battle. Remember what Sartre said:

Never believe that fascists are completely unaware of the absurdity of their replies. They know that their remarks are frivolous, open to challenge. But they are amusing themselves, for it is their adversary who is obliged to use words responsibly, since he believes in words. The fascists have the right to play. They even like to play with discourse for, by giving ridiculous reasons, they discredit the seriousness of their interlocutors. They delight in acting in bad faith, since they seek not to persuade by sound argument but to intimidate and disconcert. If you press them too closely, they will abruptly fall silent, loftily indicating by some phrase that the time for argument is past.

Conservatives around the world for the past ~30 years (if not longer) have been slowly adopting fascist methods and talking points. And for the past ~10 years, conservatives and fascists have formed a Venn diagram of a circle.

Arguing in general is pointless.

Thats not to say that having a discussion about how to do something isn't useful, of course it is. But beliefs, ideals? People dont get those from arguments. Refine them, maybe, but its extremely rare that someone changes their mind after defending their POV.

Getting involved in a land war in Asia. Also going in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.

Fallen for those blunders more than once!

Trying to apply nuance to a discussion that consists of people that only want to polarize the subject.

Arguing with bots. They have nothing to lose, they will never change their minds, and they just pollute the discussion with brainrot banter

Arguing with Nazi bots is even worse

Trying to pick up my cat. She won't let me. I just want to hold her. 🥺

Trying to fight the "ghosts" of my past. These ghosts that haunts me and give me depression and CPTSD.

I sometimes just revisit happy memories and just try to keep that image of the loving mother in my head, and try to ignore the bad things. Using good memoires to hide away the trauma, to cover up the darkest memories.

Doesn't work well. No matter how much I try to remember the happiness... the moments of me crying, being scared, inside what's supposed to be my own home, supposed to be a safe space, yet those memoies keep coming back, seeping in to my head as I daydream and fantasize in nostalgia... of just being a normal kid and loved by parents... and not have a hostile older brother always fighting with me...

this "battle" still ongoing... :/

Arguing with religious people. As my grandfather said, “you cannot reason a person out of a position they did not reason themselves into.”

If the boss doesn’t like you for whatever reason you’re done.

Just get out of there, fighting their bullshit never works.

Arguing facts with an idiot, an ignorant person

Trying to not get injured while cycling.

99% of all arguments on the internet. Someone is almost always going to engage in some kind of pedantry, butwhatabout, technicality, argumentative fallacy, etc. to try to make themselves right and/or imply the OP was wrong in some way. They are not open to having their mind changed. Especially when it comes to politics, and there’s essentially no hope for religion at all. This generally applies to IRL discussions, too. At least the internet argument you can just walk away, block, or unsubscribe to any replies to the thread.

In the same vein…expecting anyone to change. People have to change themselves, and it’s not up to you. You can’t make it happen except maybe in the most extreme situations, and even then it might be iffy.

And I hate to say it, apologizing on the internet. Once the downvote train starts and shitting on the offender’s posts there’s almost no way out and any apology isn’t worth the effort. I find this kinda hypocritical seeing as there are numerous internet posts about the value of admitting you don’t know something or might have it wrong, and how we shouldn’t shame people for admitting that, yet if someone screws up and apologizes they’re usually hosed. Just reinforces not apologizing.

Saying no to my dog when he wants a refill of his treat ball

Mine is like you, but much more general: trying to argue. Period. Doesn’t matter with whom. People of all kinds don’t like to have their views challenged.

Trying to win in a fighting game against an online opponent.

I rarely have lost in person against family or friends at home or even against randoms in an arcade. I have even come 3rd place in a local Smash competition. I never win online. Not once. 😩

For people to understand that we have to have nazis and the people in power as a common enemy. Dividing the people against them is their goal because it works.

I don't care about Schumer, I don't care about the 8 (or 9+) who sold out, we have to gather our forces and go. Also, the people who stood up to them deserve kudos. This shutdown lasted for a very long time. I appreciate all that took the hit for us.

Argueing with idiots is futile because they drag you down to their level where they beat you with experience

I just don’t argue with anyone anymore. At all. I say what I have to say once, and if they continue to restate their option at me like a fact I just can’t seem to comprehend the infinite wisdom of…I just waddle away.

Going to those places with all the claw machines and trying to come out ahead

I’d expand it to arguing with people who don’t want to challenge their postures. It’s the human condition that we substitute thinking with emotion by default, and it takes significant cognitive effort to mitigate that.