Stop being an incel and self reflect rather than posting a new derivation of this ask every day, douchebag.
this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2025
-16 points (19.2% liked)
No Stupid Questions
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No such thing. Ask away!
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Would you date you right now?
- Don't be ugly, especially not inside, but it helps to look like you at least care about your body and appearance. Added bonus: by going to the gym/hiking/bicycling/being active, you'll get out more and meet more people. The stronger your network, the more likely you will meet a person who is a good match. Funny things happen when you get deep into active hobbies: you meet more people with those same interests.
- Choose partners because of how well they match with who you are right now. Stated another way: don't choose potential mates on deterministic physical traits. Sure, everyone wants the super-hot partner. Choose partners because traits over which they have control appeal to you.
- Even if you meet a great person, that person will most likely change. Emotional maturity here is supporting and understanding your partner's growth. If you cannot accept how the person has changed, end gracefully and amicably. Move on.
- "Keys to her heart:" Communication. Ask, listen. Corollary to that, being explicit about your needs and wants in a relationship. Out of 8 billion people, your romantic paradigm cannot possibly be unique. It's up to you to develop the patience, emotional intelligence, and interpersonal skills to fulfill those needs by nurturing healthy relationships.
- Anxiety and agoraphobia: get help. Empathy by way of anecdote, I have crushing depression, paralyzing anxiety, and nearly intractable ADHD. I spent almost three years in intensive therapy, with two separate therapists, seeing them both every week. TL;DR: want results? Put in the self-work.
- "Feels like my time of finding someone has gone past its chances:" The time is past only if you give up or you're dead. Here's a speedrun of how "too-late" it is: I imploded my first two marriages. The second marriage didn't even last a year, although we were together for 20 months prior to getting hitched. After a few years of working on myself and examining the root causes of my failures, I met my dream partner at 47 years old. We just had our 8-year anniversary.
- "Hopefully I can get out of this deep hole I’m in as I’m in a terrible rut right now:" When you're in a hole, stop digging. Change whatever it is you need to change. Otherwise if you keep doing what you've done, you're going to keep getting what you got.
There's no key to anyone's heart. The less you obsess over dating and sex, the happier you will be.
Should probably focus on mitigating the extreme anxiety and agoraphobia as step 1.
What are your strengths? How do you get into a position where you get to show your strengths but your weakness does not matter.
I got no answers when it comes to that question tbh sadly
Then you get to pick. What do you think makes a person awesome to be around and what would you like to aspire to be like?
Everything that isn’t me I guess
Quit the goon
What does a man do, Walter? A man provides for his family. (...) When you have children, you always have family. They will always be your priority, your responsibility. And a man... a man provides. And he does it, even when he's not appreciated. Or respected. Or even loved. He simply bears up, and he does it. Because he's a man.