this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2025
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I think it depends on size and relationship. Nobody brought anything to my grandparents (either side) until I started to. But it was always 10-11 people. Except when their same age siblings came, they'd bring something (much younger great aunt was never considerate of oma and opa). At my in laws' we cook a dish. If we lived in town I'd probably bring a casserole, but even before we moved far away we still were hours away and you don't want to leave a casserole for hours.
Friends though, always bring a dish except for the ones friend who has made it crystal clear that she doesn't want people doing so because she's insane and shows her love through elaborate meal planning. For her we just try to keep her liquor and wine cabinet overstocked and demand she let us help her with anything she wants.
Yeah I cook for Easter and don't expect anybody to bring anything but it's not as big as Thanksgiving. We had an enormous Halloween party too, but that was more drinking than eating, we just got a nice veggie platter and fried chicken and some dips & chips (sourdough crackers, tortilla crisps) but good cocktails.
I do enjoy hosting in general, it's satisfying and a party is more fun for me when I have something to do.